por que se produce el cancer de mama

hello, good afternoon.hello. thank you. thank you. today i won't see youso well with this light. my team has gota surprise for me. it's this. today i feela bit like ricky martin. spotlights, colours...fine. perfect. ok, we've beguna series of talks and we decided to discussconflict in couples. if you ask me,if the question is...

is this connected?ok. yes. if the question is whyconflict in couples... you already knowi'm a thinker, i think a lot aboutwhat i observe and what i seein the world. and one thing we reallysee in the world is that there isa lot of suffering. you just have to turn onthe tv every day and people are dying here,being killed there,

some are drowning, etc.,it never ends. and every day the same. and some news storiesare always repeated. in the end it's like we geta hard skin and we see people dying and it's as if we wereimmunised or vaccinated. call it what you want. given this unfeelingworld i live in, after a long timewhat i'm watching is not happening outside me,obviously it's happening outside,

what i'm seeing has to dowith our awareness. it has to do with us. this brings you to a thoughtwhich is not dual, a holistic thoughtor an integrated thought, a quantum vision of reality, when we understand thatwe are making the world we live in. and i've also realisedthat if i stand for or against the things i see,

far from solving the problem,i'm making it worse. what i'm saying now,you don't need to be a thinker or a philosopheror even very smart. you just need to pay attention. and think... of course, we look forthe whole story. and obviously, the story,the world is the way it is because of us,we are saying it should be like that. it's very childish to thinkthat what happens to me

or the circumstances around me, are the responsibilityof other people. we're amazed at how people embezzlepublic funds, how they turn things around, how they say certain thingsagainst other cultures, other societies,other nations. and all of these are conflicts. i remember,a long time ago now,

a person whoi regard as very enlightened, i'm not going to name him,because it doesn't matter. he always said the same thing, that if we want peace in the world, the first thing to dois have peace in our hearts. and that was a long time ago,and it has always been in my mind and has always affectedmy perception. since then, a lot of you know mefrom my videos, courses and lectures, and i really want tocontribute something

so that some day peacecan live in our hearts. it has to startwith our minds. we have to be able tofind mental peace. i'm sure of one thing,that while i feel separated from other people, and i thinki have no responsibility for what's happeningin my life, and while i keep projectingthe causes of my problems onto other people,we aren't going to make progress. because this is how the world worksand how most people think.

and i say most people,because thank goodness, the world is changing,and the proof that it's changing is the people here,for example. because without that resonancethere would be nobody here. so somehow,each of you has made a reality which iswhat i'm talking about today. if you think i'm hereand you've come... rather, i'm herebecause you called me. you can see thingsin many ways.

because i canset up a lecture. but nobodyhas to come. that's the truth. and if nobody comes.i won't be here. i could be here and take a walk,"nobody came, bye". and i could stay home,it wouldn't matter. that's why i'mso grateful to you. and you know why i'm grateful?for a very simple reason, because really,if there is a force making me keep to the pathand to my process,

it's all of you. it isn't me. because it's one thingto preach in the wilderness. but in fact i don't preachin the wilderness. i don't preach at all.that's true too. but oddly enough, the lectures,the talks i give, i've been told,on google, have reached14 million people. well, clicks.

i think that's a lot of people and i would never have expected it. so i thank all of youwho allow me to be here and give me strengthto keep coming up with thoughts and reflections. so if i start with the basisthat what's outside is a reflectionof how i live my life, the first and onlyquestion i should ask is how i relateto myself.

and to relate to myself,i need somebody. we live in a dual world. so all storiesbegin with the same story, which is, i relate to myselfand to someone who i think, i believe i'm in love with,and is the one, my soulmate. it doesn't matter. one plus one makestwo in this world. then if my first relationshipwhich is with myself

is through somebody else, the first important otherin my life is my partner. so the first keyto all the world's conflicts, where do they start? they start with me.and projects, with who? with my partner. now we're getting warmer. we can stop looking. in the unitary world,

in the world of one plus oneequals one, i don't have to look for anyonebecause i'm aware that everything is in me. but in the world of dualitywhere one plus one equals two, one plus one equals two,and two is a couple. or not. it all started with adam and eve. which is two. fine.

if everything is a projection, the first question:"how do i get on with my partner?" "what types of partner do i find?" "what type of persondo i relate to?" with the ones i havean affinity to, which i'm going to call resonance. because we get together because ofresonance, information. we've all had the experience. we meet someone

and we suddenly feelsomething here, like butterflies. and you tell your friend:"i've fallen in love." because we have to labelthat physical sensation. the mind labels everything. "i've fallen in love. i think i've found the one." it's happened to me. i remember with my first wife...

i've been married twice,and that's enough. my first wife, i rememberi was 17 or 18. i was with my friends. we were goofing around. and a girl went by, and i saidto the boy next to me: "i'm going to marry that girl." "don't be dumb,"he said. and i got married 8 years later. we hadn't seen each other since.

but when i saw her, i felt something:"i'm going to marry that woman." it's like that. how can we explain that?we can't. intellectually, we can't.with a dual mind, we can't. that's why one of the thingsthat i've really learned thanks to all of you,and all the people i've seen and all the consultationsthat i've done, i've realised that the keyto the world becoming better begins in howi relate to my partner.

and here, ladies and gentlemen, the world of the ego begins, which is what i'm going to try to clarify today, so you can clear up your questions, free yourselves from traumas,free yourselves from guilt and each one can beginto accept their responsibility. are you following? i'll try to do this.

and to begin,i'm going to read some thoughts,i could read more, i'll read them. they're all true.taken from here and there. nearly all collected by me. "i let my partner do what he wantsso he doesn't leave me." i'm asking you whatyou think of these phrases. i'm not asking youyour opinion of these phrases. is that clear?

because an opinionis a judgement. i say the phrase literally, oddly enough this ladysuffers from an illness, hypothyroidism. if you don't know, hypothyroidism relates towasting your time. in other words:i justify myself, i ration my shitty life, i justify it.still following?

but my biology expressesmy own inconsistency. how often have you heard ofemotional consistency? what i think,what i feel and what i do. and you can't imaginehow many traps the ego has, how many traps in the beliefthat i'm separated from others to justifyanything in my life. and when i reach a certain age,i look back and wonder, what have i done with my life? another.

this was from a newspaper. "i've spent more than 40 yearsputting up with all kinds of abuse for me and my daughtersuntil my son killed himself." this was in the newspaper.i think there were 47. and my wife told me. "now my husbandhits me less." well, he must be getting tired. or bored. no, no, in my clinic i've hadpeople who have justified to me

that they have been raped,or they have been abused. they justified these things in my clinic,when i worked as a psychologist, which i don't now,when i worked as a psychologist, i said to a patient:"listen, we have to go to the police. i can't listen to thisand not say anything." she said: "no, no. i was wrong.that was two years ago." of course, if you deny it,well, me too. these are selected phrasesthat i noted just now,

before i came here. "i don't like sexthe way my husband does it, but i let it pass becausei want him to be happy." she was sodomised. so he would be happy.very nice. "since i got married, i knewhe wasn't the man for me." they're still together. and more: "everything is fine with my husband.i'm very much in love." and later in the clinic,i find that all her illnesses

began when she found outher husband had sex with a friend of her son, in their home. and we could go on like thisall afternoon. of course, the first thought, as i've studied psychology,i think: "these people are allwrong in the head." but this is easy to think. it's very easy to think that. it's easy and tedious to treat.

"talk to me. let's go.let's work on your self-esteem." all of that. i think this can be resolvedmuch more quickly. first, understandingthat these people are not stupid. first, understandingthat this information that these peopleare manifesting in their lives does not appear by magic, it's not the cross god has given them, it's not bad karmafrom previous lives,

none of that... there is all of that.this is much simpler. if we have a vision,if we think in a quantum way, if we think holistically, if we think in a quantum way,and if we think everything is information, as i'll explainover the course of the afternoon, we will realisethat in fact, i'm half hypnotised. i go through life resonatingan information that my unconscious, which dominates 95 or 97%of my psyche,

is constantlyinterrelating with similar or complementary information. if we look at things this way, then my partnerwill not be a problem. my partner will be my salvation. it's a proposition. if you like, we'll go on.and if not, i'll go home. i think it's a very simple,logical, common sense proposal. haven't you often wonderedwhy you always end up with

the same people andthe same stories? well, because it's how you think,it's how you reason. and that resonates in your life. if we change and stop fallinginto the trap of thinking i have good or bad luck,to find whoever it is, if we stop thinking thatand begin to realise that my partner isthe great opportunity that the universe, that the field has sent me so ican learn to know myself because without the otheri can't know myself.

i'm not saying anything weird. carl gustav jung, who i'llquote some thoughts of later, carl gustav jung said: "we are constantly projectingour shadow onto others." we are always seeingin others what we like and what we don't like. that's why today's talkis about conflicts with partners: their projections. you, each of you,

are with the partneryou should be with. and your partner is not good or bad. he or she is perfect. but i'm also going to tell youthat partners don't have to lasta lifetime. that is a belief. the best partnersmay stay just two hours. and they will have done their job. you'll see over the afternoon.

this is just a zip file. i'm just summarisingeverything we're going to see. look how dualistic our minds are, when the communicationsdepartment announced the lecture, some people saidthings like: "what about ifyou don't have a partner?" from a dual point of view,the question is logical. from an integrated point of view,it does not compute.

so... what do we understandby conflict in couples? if you tell me: "i live fine without a partner.i get on well with my partner." there's no conflict. "i haven't got a partner.i don't get on with my partner." there's a conflict. so, if i'm sufferingin some way, not having a partner, you have a partner conflict.

because if you didn't have a conflict,you'd be happy without a partner. it isn't... a partner conflict is havinga partner or not having a partner. if i don't have an intimaterelationship with anyone, i have a partner conflict. because the first law of biology, is one plus one makes twoso we get 3, 4, 5 and 25. if not, we wouldn't be here. yes or no?here there are lots of beliefs.

it's true i could bevery peaceful living without a conventional partner. according to the norms of society.there are other things. so, partner conflict,in terms of partner conflict, we all have partner conflicts. in fact, we have partnersso we can have conflicts. because if not, it isn't a partner.it's just boring. there have to be ups and downs. because if not...can you imagine?

"hello." "how are you, dear?" there must be... a bit of something else,if not, there's no significance. there must be changing opinions. my wife and iare both very stubborn, and when we get stubborn,each one in their corner, it's like a train crash. boom! but we knowhow to crash.

and we know howbecause when we do it, we've learned not to blame each other,you know? not to hurt each other. not to playthe victim and the victimiser. are you following?we learn from that crash. what was i really projecting? what was bothering meabout the other person? what do i have to integrate? still following?

the next step to takefrom that moment on is that the concept "blame"in all the words i'm going to say, from that moment on doesn't exist. ok? and much less, victim and victimiser. this is a position. this is a belief.this is being in a pigeon-hole. if you play at victimand victimiser, you'll suffer. if you play atthe victim and the victimiser,

you'll get ill. that's why i call thisspecial relationships. and our special relationshipshave to become relationships in freedom,being together. knowing that we share things. and sharing to be ableto learn from each other, because without the otherwe're nothing. and if i don't look for anybody, my first problem is that ihave a relationship conflict

with myself. because, in this world,the logical, normal and biological thingis sharing. ok, family? are we thinking yet?are we reflecting? perfect. so, what is a partner? at minimum, there are two people. obviously, i want to bevery clear about something now. because i don't want peopleasking me later: "what about gays?"

look, that question can onlybe asked by the ego. when i talk about a partner,i'm talking about a couple. two people. the unconscious... the unconsciousdoesn't care whether they're the same genderor not the same gender. it makes no difference. we're talking aboutconflict in couples. yes?

so, gay couples,homosexuals or lesbians, they're here too. because they have the samepartner conflicts. they have their own storieswith their partners. are you following?ok? i want to be clear. if i use a conventional termand talk about a man and a woman, i don't strictly meana man and a woman, just a couple. now that's clear.

i've learned a lotin this world. so i try to make surei point these things out, because people can getannoyed very quickly. people in generalare quick to point the finger. it's amazing how fastwe can draw. let's start pointing the finger."look what he said." well, someone said the worldwe see is not what we see, it's how we interpret it. we're always interpretingthe world according to

our beliefs,our conventionalisms, and everythingwe've been taught. we don't see the world as it is. i remember nowan anecdote, while i'm on the subject. a guy i know went to marrakesh,and when he got back, he said: "wow, enrique.i've been in marrakesh." i said: "so? me too."he said: "they're all queers over there." "jeez. oh really?why do you say that?"

he said: "because a lot of mengo around holding hands." and i said: "but that's normal there.you're young. but here in spain, i've seenhow women friends used to hold hands,or walk arm in arm. nowadays i don't know. but you havethat experience, mine is very different." i told him i was in thatvery big square in marrakesh, and my wife said to me:

"dear, please keep an eye out,i just got my bottom pinched." so if you asked me i would have said:"they're womanisers over there." and if you asked the other guy,he'd say they were the opposite. so what is the world like? could anyone really saywhat marrakesh is like? i can't. everyone findstheir own story. the problem... well, that my wife got her bottompinched was not an interpretation,

that happened. that was clear. and that men went aroundholding hands is also true. but here there is an interpretation,you follow me? because no-one triedto hold hands with him. fine,why explain all this? so we realisethe world we believe we live in is false. and you know what's worst?

believing in this false worldmakes us ill too, that's the pits. ok. fine. what is a partner for you?someone who will go through life with me? an occasional relationship? a relationship which is worth morethe longer it lasts? and why do you want a partner? to not be alone? to look after me?

to have sex?to not get bored? to distract me?to protect me? to take me on holiday?to take me in their ferrari? to take me in their yacht? and tomorrow we're writing. that's what you have to answer.i don't mind. why do you want a partner? of course,there's a biological attraction, that is already partof biological programmes.

there's an attraction, full stop,which is so life can continue. also, it's very odd,now i'm a grandfather, how much the world changeswhen you have a child. and when you're a grandparentthe world changes again. everything changes. "you don't know what parenthoodis like till you have kids." it's true. i said to my daughter: "my girl,the universe has ended. you're not the centreof the universe any more.

it's all over. it's over. the centre of the universe,from now on, is your kids. until the day you die.that's normal." because you might be 90,like her grandmother, who's 92, and she sees her grandchildrenand great grandchildren, and i think she isn't deadbecause she wants to see all of them. the other day i read in the paper a scientific study that said when someone becomes a grandparent,they're rejuvenated.

for this to happen something has toproduce what i'm seeing. isn't it true? so, what i'm seeingis affecting me. it also said this isn't the caseif the grandparents are young. grandparents from a certain age. such as... maybe from 60.it didn't say an age. but it's true that todaythanks to technology, when you want to geta photo of your granddaughter

in this case,i say to my daughter... i go to pick up the mobileand i'm about to ask her: "where's today's photo?" and before i can get the mobiletoday's photo is arriving. that's synchronicity. and i said: "very good,i was about to ask for it." so i let my daughterbegin acting like a mother. "oh, look, look this... look that..."and she sent me the baby talk. and i thought:"i've gone crazy."

i'm completely droolingover this baby. so, of course,i'm very observant, and i don't repressthese biological reactions, because they say a lot. so if one thing is clear,it's that alone, we would be very bored. welcome to partners. sometimes they have kidsand sometimes that makes us grandparents. this is biological.ok?

that it's so importantwhat you want a partner for. later there are lots of conflictsas you'll see. i've chosen about 11 casesthat sum up the whole story. ok. let's continue. to begin becoming awareof what we're going to do from this moment on,now we're getting to the subject, i'm going to talk to youabout some assumptions. assumptionsdon't have to be true,

but they can be very useful. as far as i know, god,in scientific terms, doesn't exist. in fact, a lot of scientists,if you ask them: "do you believe in god?",they answer: "i'm a scientist." well,but do you believe in god? how many people pray? how many people believethere's something more? since men were monkeysand began looking up. so we have to introducea factor which is ignored

but which is fundamental. and which, thank god,jung was well aware of, and i'll quote him later. the spiritual factor cannot beleft out of the equation of life, because it's immanentin all of us. they don't have to tell youthere's something more. in the end we all cometo the conclusion that this intelligencecannot have come from nothing, and there is a lot of intelligence herefor it to be random.

believing that life arose randomlyis believing that a hurricane can go through a junkyardand make a jumbo jet. on the first try. ok?assumptions. "what we have to heal is the mind. the body can't doanything by itself. your beliefs converge on the body."that's true, isn't it? who doesn't have to do something and has a belief about itand it doesn't affect them physically.

let's continue. "so the thoughtmaterialises in your life you need a belief." everything around youhas to do with you. that's holistic thinking. "the other doesn't exist, what you perceiveis your own projection." i'm going to stop here, because someone said: "oh, it's great thatyou explained it in vigo, enric". fine.obviously, you're here.

it's clear. maybe more than 200 people. but what you seein this talk depends on each of you. we're constantly projecting. i don't exist. you're projecting on me. and each of you will experiencethis talk differently. that's the truth.

thinking, believing... that what you have interpretedis what i've said here today... it's not right. because you can meetsomeone who says "what did you think of the talk?"-"fantastic." "well i didn't think so."but it's the same talk. and the same words. and some people might feeloffended or angry.

or very pleased.and they'll all be right. because what i'm trying to dohere and now is make you think and reflectand make you uncomfortable. if you come outreally uncomfortable, if you come outfeeling a bit confused, if you think:"i don't know why i came," you should knowi didn't call you. you're supposed to be hereof your own free will. so you're responsible.

if you get homeand your stomach is upset, or you don't want to eat,don't blame me. don't blame yourselves either. ask yourself: "what did i see, what did i hear,that stirred me up like that?" this is an intelligent question. the others are misfires.are you following? "next time i won't go."

well,it's one way to stay asleep. i remember the case of a manwho watched my videos, where i talk abouta course in miracles, a man with a lot of faith in me:"whatever enrique says". that's bad too, ok? that's terrible too. so then he decided,as he was a believer, which i think is fine,he bought the book. and three days later he burnt it.

and he didn't burn mebecause i wasn't there. he wrote me a letter. because he wanted to projectguilt onto me. listen... some people see my videosand get furious. so stop watching. "ah, no. you have to keep on watching.we're going to crucify him." ok. that's how we work.

we see the sin in the other, we see the speck in the other's eyeand we don't realise we have a beamin our own. but i didn't say that,people were saying that a long time ago. yes or no? buddha, 2500, jesus, and others. but this hasn't changed,it hasn't gone out of date. it's still true. but in the old daysjust a few people

heard and understood itand the people who said it got crucified for sayingthings you aren't supposed to say. fine. let's continue."the other does not exist." he doesn't exist...in the literal sense, he does exist. he doesn't exist in the sense of"what do i see in the other?" that's what i'm projecting.is it clear, that the other doesn't exist? what's more, i can be watching something, interpreting it,

and this affects me physically. because for my unconsciousthe other does not exist. only i exist.are you following? my daughter, who is a pharmacist,said to me: "look dad, the babyhas some spots on her face. it must be from the goat's cheesei ate a few days ago." and i said: "it might be. it might be.

do you want meto say something else?" she said:"that's why i told you, dad." and then i said: "i know you've hada conflict with your sister. and you got really angry."-"yes, i already apologised to her." "maybe you felt, as it's milk,you felt you were playing mother." and after a while she answered:"ok, dad. thanks." are you following? do you understandwhat i'm explaining? can you see it? i'm not sayingeating a certain food

has caused a problem. but ask yourselfwhat went with it. what did you add to it?not the sauce, no. an extra. and right then.ok? and with partnersthis happens more. with partners, the extrasare all the time. it's like a dance.always adding something. "each meeting,each relationship is an opportunity. don't miss it."

if the same situationkeeps repeating, day after day,sound familiar? waiting for the miraclethat will change the other, take a seat. get comfortable. relax. have a beer.a few crisps. a few snacks,because it'll be a long wait. a long, long wait.

i know peoplewho've been waiting their whole lives for them to change. friends say: "but didn't you sayyou don't like that kind of men?" they say: "yes. but i'll change him."yes, yes. yes, yes. ok, it doesn't matter. you may get boredbeing with that person. ask yourself:what did i meet him for? what did he come into my life for?what do i need to learn from this? are you following?don't miss opportunities.

when you meet a guy in the streetand he says something to you, don't say... just a moment.first listen to what he says. and how he says it. i remember a girl...i have a lot of anecdotes. ...who thought she hada fat bottom. she had a fat bottom complex. i thought she was fine.but these are opinions. but she was absolutelyconvinced about it.

and one day she was very angry,and i said: "what's the matter?" she said: "i walk down the streetand everyone looks at my bottom." and i said:"and what do they say?" and she said:"oh, what a butt!" and i said: "so they like it."she didn't see it that way. are you following? they didn't say:"what a horrible butt!" "what a butt!"men were saying to her. these are resonances. i think my bottom isa certain way,

and then god sends down the archangel gabrieland says to him: "find me someone to tell hershe's got a great bottom!" and he sendsa few horny guys who like big bottomsso she can realise in the worldthere are people for everything. we don't all have to be the same,so thin and flat you can't see anything. some people likesomething to hold onto.

up here too,but we're talking about bottoms. laugh if you like.otherwise we might cry. instead of crying,let's laugh. i see you liked that one.is anything wrong with your bottom, miss? maybe today someone told youyou have a nice bottom. they did say it. you see?this is resonance. and she's in the front row,the archangel gabriel came here and said: "tell her she has a nice butt."

that's how this works. how can we explainthese things? because the whole universe resonates. everything is information. so... oh, this wasn'ta set-up, ok? i've never metthis young lady. i haven't seen her bottom either,she's sitting down. and with the light in my eyesi can't see anything. ok. you see?this is an example.

i love examplesthat aren't set up. boom, here it is. fine. "in your relationships you findyour perdition or your liberation." i repeat: there are no goodor bad relationships, they're all perfect.they all have a purpose. each meeting must be holy, each meeting is an opportunityto know yourself. yourself. i'll continue.

"the problems areways of thinking." some people see a situationand see a problem. and others see an opportunity. einstein told us, crises are opportunitiesto change and grow. without a crisis... have you seen the martian?i saw it yesterday. you haven't seen it?well, i like matt damon. he plays an astronaut strandedon mars and his adventures.

he says: "this is designedto last 30 days. i'm dead." and everyone says: "of course." but i like the filmfor its intelligence and how he starts to realisehe has some expertise and he can transform his environmentand make what objectively is meant to last 30 days,60 at most... and they can't come andrescue him for months. so the guy starts tothink about it, and he gets sand,he puts it in a container,

mars sand, obviously,and starts fertilising it. he says:"how can i fertilise it? i know." and he goes and gets the crapthe astronauts were pooing every day, which is also packagedwith their names, because nasalooks after the details. so the guy starts tofertilise the soil with it, and as there were frozenpotatoes there, he thaws them, cuts them up,and then... he starts calculating:this many potatoes.

"with one or two potatoesper day, i can live." and then...i'm not going to tell you the whole film. i mention it becausethank goodness for problems and thank goodness for difficultiesbecause they are a wonderful way to sharpen our intelligence. so you can make your problemswith your partner into an opportunity to overcome. and later if the relationship ends,you hug each other, bless each other, say thank you.

and don't worry, someone else will comewho is in tune with the resonance. don't worry. there will be new difficulties.don't you worry. so i say with love, nothing is more stupidthan the case from before who said, "i let my partner do everythingso he doesn't leave me." and i said: "a good-looking woman like youis going to have plenty of suitors. but if you don't see it,if you don't feel it,

if you undervalue yourself that much,what do you hope to find? someone who doesn't value you,someone who doesn't respect you." still following?ok. obviously, we can't wake upfrom a dream if we think we aren't the dreamer. obviously, we can't learnfrom our relationships if we think our relationships,when we meet someone, it's good or bad luck. in fact,jung talked about synchronicity.

synchronicity can be explainedfrom the point of view of quantum physics. today i when said: "my daughter hasn'tsent me a photo of the baby." and then it arrives. because time runs backwards. in the quantum field, thedecision was already made. later, in the dual field,it manifests sooner or later. the information reaches you,you think of a photo and the photo appears.

and you say:"i have powers." you don't have powers.you're connected. i've had peoplethat say to me: "i don't know what i was thinkingthe day i met my partner." well, you were fine.in tune. are you warming up yet?let's go on. while i'm talking aboutinformation and resonance, let's talk about some principlesof physics, which everyone sees as the father ofall the sciences.

the principle ofconservation of energy says, i quote: "energy can neither be created nor destroyed,it is transformed." do you know it? you do, right?well, it doesn't look like it. it doesn't look like it. we know it, but we don't live it. look well at what it says.just a few words. one, two, three, four, five,six, seven, eight, nine, ten.

look, how odd. ten.divinity. in numerology. energy is not createdor destroyed. if energy doesn't havea beginning or end, energy is forever. isn't it? if it is not created nor destroyed,it's eternal, isn't it? have you ever heardgod is the alpha and the omega? you haven't heard that?well i have, i study a lot. god is the alpha and the omega.

yes?the beginning and the end. so, if godis the beginning and the end, it is. we live between that beginning and end. you can call it:a sea of consciousness, the quantum field,universal energy, universal intelligence.call it what you want. and quantum physicstells us: "the quantum informationincorporated in material

is never destroyed." the most important word:are we, or are we not energy? i believe so. oh my. i think so. and are we information? that is obvious. and not only we arethe manifestation of information, but also the informationis codified.

and that informationin the form of dna, the rubbish that is not,plus the other, they carry informationwe transmit from generation to generation, which is a way of livingin that world for ever. that is:because the important thing is the information. please remember that. if it's informationand that information is energy,

we can all agreethat information has frequencies. that's how it is. it has frequencieswhich are different. and therefore the frequenciesrepel or attract each other. you follow? and we, with our partner attract and repel each other. or do you still not know that?

you do, right?welcome to the club of the living. because this ishow the universe works. what this showsis that death doesn't exist. if i'm information and energycannot be created or destroyed, technically,when my body disappears, my information is still there. are you thinking? well, this line of thoughtled hawking,

the famous physicist,the one with als... he talked about black holes, and he said... have you seen interstellar? there is a moment when the astronautgoes into a black hole, and doesn't die. hawking said that if i wasan observer seeing an astronaut go into a black hole,i would see him disintegrate. but he also said,if i was the astronaut, i wouldn't perceive the disintegration.

so it's the observerwho thinks the other person dies. death is only experiencedby those who stay here. the one who technically diesis the only one who can't experience death. because of the principleof conservation of energy. well,if someone is afraid of dying, i'll understand that they areafraid of how they'll die. because, don't be afraid of dying.you aren't going to die. if i'm a frequency,

if i vibrate and my informationresonates with how i see and understand the world...still following? ...it's clear that my information will go where it resonates. you know the phrase"birds of a feather flock together"? there you go. and obviously i will still be,over the centuries, forever, in other people.in everything around me. thank god for partners.

thank goodness i have a partner,even though sometimes i want to kill her. because if sometimes i want to kill her,i'll ask myself: "what am i projectingonto her to feel like that?" are you following? ok.i hope this makes you think a while. you're all very well behavedand very quiet. ok. epigenetics could bean explanation. in fact behavioural epigeneticsexplains things like this. it says that informationfrom our ancestors is passed on

to our grandchildrenand great-grandchildren. did you know that? i can recommend a film. when you start watching it,it seems a bit odd, and you might say:"what a stupid film!" but don't worry,it turns out great. the film is calledeverything is illuminated and the actor looks likehe came from the munsters or something, withbig goofy glasses.

the subject of the film, well, the director reallydidn't know about epigenetics, or didn't know much aboutinformation and how it's transmitted. the film is about a very strangeboy whose father dies, and his mother says: "look, dadleft you this photo." it's an old photoshowing some people, a woman and a man,who is his grandfather who looks a lot like him.

and they are in a place,where the jews, i think they're ina soviet republic, i think it's georgia or ukraine,it doesn't matter, a soviet republicwhere they massacred jews. just like that:the germans massacred them. so these werejews who escaped. and you see that these jewswant to go back to the country they came from, to findwho knows what or who. and he had a very oddcharacteristic:

he saved everybody's things and he had a wall covered withplastic bags full of stuff. in this case, he had the teethof his grandfather or father. he had a wall. and i thought:"he saves everything like that." and when he sees the photo, he feels the need to goto that soviet republic and find out who it was. he didn't really know who it was.

so he hires a taxi driver,who is very funny. a very strange thing. "let's search,let's search, let's search..." the question:they find a woman who is the sister ofthe woman in the photo. it turns out she was one of the few survivorswhen the germans came and killed everyonein the village. and she said:"i'll never forget you,"

and she had a room fullof bags and boxes from all the people in the village. i'm explaining itand i feel... the boy didn't knowwhy he did it! he wasn't even her son or her nephew, because her sister stayed thereand was killed. but his fathertook that information with him. are you following?and the guy did the same.

and the taxi driver had been thereand was shot, but he wasn't killed,he forgot it and in the end he discovers it. but he discovers itand doesn't know how. he says: "here." and sees a house:"this is the house." but he didn't know.he wasn't aware. in the end... i won't tell you the end,just a few things. the woman kept a ring, and there'sa very interesting conversation. "why did you bury the ring?so they came looking for it?"

and she said: "when i buried the ringi made it move." it's like placing something to attractsomeone to find it. when i saw this filmi started recommending to people. especially to people who workacross generations, etc. the way the universe really is,no information is lost. it isn't lost.it's transmitted from parents to children. like that. it's amazing.

a friend of mine told me:"guess what i discovered. my grandmother was the daughterof luis candelas. the bandit of madrid,of lavapiã©s." because when hergrandmother died they found a photo,and she showed me the photo. and i said: "my god,it looks just like your daughter." she said: "the same. exceptthe photograph is older. and now i understand my son, because he wearsbandanas on his head

and hangs around with poor people." information...information is not lost. that's why this informationneeds its authentication, needs its polarity,you follow me? you have to find the otherfor it to be possible for the two convergencesto give meaning to the couple and to have transcendence. are you following? yes?i'm trying hard. and here, with the lights,it's a bit difficult.

there are a lot ofscientific experiments. i always say the same thing, about the baby ratswith bad mothers and baby ratswith good mothers. baby rats with bad mothershave excessive methylation, and baby rats with good mothershave the right amount of methylation. excessive methylationcauses dna problems and stops some aspects of thegenome from expressing, due to the excess methylation.

they take the baby rats with bad mothers,the ones that don't lick their babies, and the good mothers arethe ones that lick and groom them, they change them and they demethylise them. so what has changed?an emotional act has changed. it's that simple. and the bible says it too. when jesus cured someone,the disciples asked: "lord, who sinned?him or his parents?" let's take out the word "sin."

"who made the mistake?him or his parents?" so our relationshipwith our partner is a resonance so that ican know myself, and once i'm awarei'll stop fighting with the other. because if i fight with the otherthe problem continues. if i want the other to change,the problem continues. and if i changeso the other changes, i'm perpetuating the problem. does this sound familiar?

more than one young ladyhas asked me: "so if i changemy husband will change?" and i say: "or not. but if you change to change him,you're perpetuating the problem." the change has to be transcendence,it has to be understanding. later they may or may not be together. how many people have come to mewho were together, who would have beenbetter off apart? and when they become aware,they recognise it and say:

"wow, who are you?"-"i'm your wife, and you?"-"i'm your husband." "well i never saw youuntil now!" i've seen all sorts. some who thoughtthey would break up recognise each otherand love each other deeply, and others who thought theyloved each other deeply, break up. in short:it can go either way. the important thing isn'tstaying together or breaking up.

the important thing is there has beenan experience of transcendence. that it's been useful for something. yes? ok?ok. let's continue. the principle of polarity. our whole universe is polar. masculine, feminine, proton, electron,black, white, attack, defence, health, illness,collaboration, competition. everything is information.everything is energy. one of the things we understand...

have you ever seena couple and said: "what do they see in each other?" haven't you? and what do they see in each other?nothing. relax, they haven't see anything. they resonate... they're in tune.they resonate perfectly. that's how it is.this is important. but we often attractpolarities which attract us

and repel us at the same time,which is quite normal. think about it.everything is information. so to be able to transcendany programming you have with your partner,or with the partner you don't have, ask yourself whyyou haven't got a partner. what are you projectingon the quantum field, for no partner to appear. are you following?so it's always the same. we're at the important part now.we're at projection.

it's an easy thing.you can make two columns. what i likeand what i don't like. what i like is in meand what i don't like too. it's like the joke about the shepherdwith black and white sheep. "whose sheep are they?"-"mine." "and the black ones?"-"them too." well, this is the same. what i likeabout my partner, what i don't likeabout my partner,

write it down. and then cross out partner. cross out partner. in my clinical work, people often find it hardto talk about their mother or their father,it's like a taboo. and i tell them: "tell me about your mother-in-law."they say: "about the mother-in-law, yes." they talk about their mother-in-law. and i say: "perfect.you're telling me about your mother."

because everything is reflected. the information about my mother's treeis complemented with information about my father's tree. you know? and the fruit comes out,which is the children. some of them resonate morein the father's tree, and some in the mother's tree,you follow me? and, for example,everyone tells me: "my mother lovesmy brother more."

well, he must resonate more. but i'm sure she loves you tooin another way. or that she has information. and obviously, what we seein our lives... put it into practice. if you don't like what you have,look at the screen of your life. what do you findevery day? i work a lotwith the screen of life. because it's easier for peopleto talk about others.

you know?later i tell them: "remove the othersand project it against yourself, because you're the one that's projectingthat information." then there's another thingi want to point out now. there are people who say: "now i knowwhy i have my partner, so i can learn this,this and this." and a month goes by, two months,six months, a year, 5, 8, 10, 15...

a lifetime. and what have you learned? because if you keep learningthe same thing every day, there's something you're not getting. i don't know if i'm explaining it well. we're so afraid of being consistentwith ourselves that in the end we justify ourselves. "no, i have my partnerbecause i have to learn this."

well,when do you expect to learn it? because if you're doingthe same thing every day, and a moth goes by, and a year,two years, three years, five, six, and you're doing the same thing,my question is, you say you'relearning something? because i swear one thing to you,i can swear it: if you change your perceptionyou'll change your world. but for your world to changeyou have to let it go. you mustn't get attached.

am i explaining thisclearly enough? it's full trust in the universe. in the universethere is only abundance. you can't say: "i already knowmy husband, i know what he's like. i have to watch out from 7 to 8 o'clock."and i say: "why?" they say: "because he gets a mood,and if he catches you, he'll belt you.so i make sure i'm out." and i say: "that can't happen." i'm not joking.this is serious.

we can't always repeatthe same experience over and over with our partner. we're hitting the wall. ask yourselves why i am repeatingthe same story again and again. don't justify it to me! you're stuck there!bam, bam, bam, bam. "i'm learning."bam, bam, bam. stop banging your headagainst the wall. you're wasting your life.

and don't be surprisedwhen you get this problem or that, this hurts,that hurts, etc. yes, yes. i hope you're feelinga little uncomfortable now. a sign it's going well. because if you don't get uncomfortable,that's bad. i want to make you think.i said that at the start, didn't i? i'm hereso you will think. i have a lot of experience.i've spoken with thousands of people. and it's very easy for usto justify ourselves...

you can't imagine. and to put up with toxic stuffin our lives, and make excuses... but we've gotbrutal imaginations. obviously, you havean experience with your partner. but you have to transcendthat experience. transcending itdoesn't take 10 years. if 10 years go by, you're stuck.you're waiting for him to change. you know?yes? him, or her.

you're doing things,hoping they'll change. but it doesn't work like that. how a woman can say: "i knew when i married himi knew i was making a mistake." and i ask her: "are you still with him?"she says: "yes." i say: "well what a mistakeyou keep making. you've been in a mistakefor 40 years." she says: "i think so too.that's why i'm here." i say: "let's see ifwe can change it.

getting it wrong for 40 years.what were you thinking?" yes, yes.and they say it calmly. well, or not. "when i did whatever, i knewi was making a mistake." well, you should have said: "up yours,go marry your mother." in this case, it was his mother. "go marry your mother,if you love her so much." how many timeshave you asked yourself, looking at the mirror,

to see yourselves,asking yourself: "let's see, big guy,let's see, big girl, how are we handlingthe partner question? how are we handling the relationship? should we carry on like thisor do something else?" do it. it's good exercise. you know what happens? the neurons, our neurons, think that you'retalking to someone.

they're convinced. also,you're looking at a person. you recognise them,but others don't see us the same. is that clear? because i don't knowif you've noticed. you touch your right earand the mirror man touches his left ear. have you never noticed? so, relax.and start talking to yourself. i look in the mirror every day and say:"so, enric? everything going ok?" he says: "well...

let's trust in the universe."-"ok." the day the mirror says no,we're in trouble. i say yes, the mirror says no,we're in trouble, right? but do it. do it.don't justify yourselves any more. the mirror effect isa secular teaching. it isn't a new thing. a course in miracles,for example, says: "your brother is the mirrorwhere you can see everything you can't see in yourself."

we need the other. take note of what it says. and it also says: "keep the swordof judgment away from the one holding the mirror that lets yousee yourself. if he doesn't hold it, you can't know yourself." it's a song of praisefor love and understanding. it's a holistic andintegrated understanding. don't go to tibetto find a master. don't climb mountains.he sleeps with you.

this is the real master. that one. really. don't travel far. you have dinner with him. make the most of your relationships.make the most of them. ok. now, you know i lovecarl gustav jung. i've read a lot of his workand it always surprises me. i always find phrases.this guy was enlightened.

how would psychology have changedif instead of being freudian it was more jungian? but it's all ok. "it is an almost absurd prejudiceto suppose that existence can only be physical. as a matter of fact, the only form of existenceof which we have immediate knowledge is spiritual." the day i found this phrase,i said: "enric, you're not so crazy." when you're sayingthat descartes appeared and separated:

"the church looks afterspirituality and science looks after the body,"that was a mistake. and we forget a factor which ispsychological and fundamental in each of you,which is spirituality. we can call it something else,it doesn't matter. there is something more. there is somethingin ourselves that transcends. because the truth iswe all have faith. even having faith thatwe'll die, that is faith. and that we don't exist,that is faith.

whoops! can you hear me ok? ok. another phrase. "life happens in a balancebetween joy and sorrow." does that sound likea couples thing? another phrase. "who looks inside, awakes." the phrase continues. "who looks outside,sleeps."

we're talking about projections. you look outside. if you think the causesof all your problems are outside, you're sleeping,jung also says. but if you look inside,you'll see your projection, you'll wake up. "an unlived life is an illnesswhich can be fatal." i love this phrase. do you how many people i see who are illbecause they don't live their lives? "what you reject masters you.what you accept transforms you."

"the healthy man does not torture others, generally it is the torturedwho turn into torturers." pay attention to this phrase. we can take it to meanthere are no victims or victimisers. the victim must be a victim once,never twice. are you not understanding? if i let myself be mistreated,i'm also becoming a victimiser. me too, because the otherkeeps doing the same thing. and nobody stops him.

birds of a feather flock together.everything is resonance. "those who learn nothingfrom unpleasant events force the cosmic consciousnessto reproduce those events as often as neededto learn the lesson of that drama." jung said that. but it could be said todayin quantum physics. and everything that irritates usabout others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.

ok? is everything clear so far?what about your partners? are you starting to look at them differently?at least you've learned that. integration. let's integrate. our real problem, which willmake us ill, is believing, is when we take a position. when we believe one thing is goodand the other thing is bad. you know?that's the problem. when we take a position,listen carefully, we lose inertia,we lose movement.

and that's when we get ill. i'll repeat that if you like. in fact, the causesof all illnesses is positioning,believing that i'm right. believing that i have my reasons. believing that my truthis the real truth. believing that there are good deedsand bad deeds. then, in a couple,it's very easy to fall into that. it's very easy to point to the other.

it's very easy to feel. when i get angrywith my wife, i tell her: "i'm going to study what it isyou said that upset me. but i'm not going to acceptthat you put the blame on me." i don't accept anyone's lame.i accept my responsibility. you understand me? and i'm thanking you,even though i'm furious. because i'm goingto transcend this rage. i don't know if i'm explaining it well.i'm going to transcend it.

i'm not going to fall in the trapof "you made me nervous!" or things we say: "you make me sick!"you make yourself sick. we say that, don't we, dear?yes, we say a lot of silly things. but those silly things go insideand do a lot of damage. "it's all right,"and you say that. but breathe for a moment,count to 20 and think: "let's see, what am i seeingin the other to make me say it's making me sick?

where's my intolerance,where's my rigidity, and where's my sillinessif this is making me ill, why am i putting up with itfor a day, two or three days, five years?" animals are smarterthan human beings. they get burned once.not twice. man is the only idiotwho trips over the same stone twice,and 3 or 4 or 25 times or 10 years. and he complains about the stonesomeone put in the road when he put the stonethere himself.

and they give the angelsa lot of work. putting stones thereuntil we learn. "what is facing you is notgood or bad, it's perfect. if you don't like itthat doesn't mean it's bad. if you like itthat doesn't mean it's good. living in polaritybrings you to non-movement, inertia, illness. polarities are the forcethat creates movement." if these complementarypolarities didn't exist,

movement wouldn't exist. physics, chemistry,explain it very well. we live in a technicallystable universe because the atomic particlesgather together and produce what we call matter. therefore, difficulties are what reallymake you grow in life. i remember i was in argentina,in buenos aires, and i had a story in my mind,

i was angry about a storywhich happened to me. in this situation,what do you ask the universe for? "a quick answer please,i've forgiven myself, come on, get a move on." and a truck went pastand stopped in front of me. and written on it was: "all your hate, all your disdainis the strength that makes me grow." i got the message, thanks.the truck left. quite a coincidence, no?

the thing is,in the quantum field, before things happenthey know they're going to happen. if not, we wouldn't getsynchronicity. "now i'll have to look fora truck." the archangel gabriellooking for trucks. put one in front of me! no.we don't live towards the future. we're living our past. i've often said itin many videos. it's hard for people to understand.but if not, how could this happen?

there are a lot of experimentsthat demonstrate it. there are experiments which lookinto the brain and the scientists know if you're going to press the whiteor black switch before you do it. so the quantum field alreadyknows what you're going to do. if the quantum field already knowswhat you're going to do and gives it to you, if you continue fighting becauseyou'd like your partner not to do that, what is your partnergoing to do? that. what we most try to changestays the same.

what you integrate,you transcend. this is the trick to how it works.this is the big trick. this is how the story works. don't complain. transcend. don't justify,because if you justify your lives, they're going to be shitty lives. well, don't worry. you'll get anotherso you can keep doing the same thing until you get bored.

even jung said that. "as long as you keep doing the same thing,if you don't learn..." i'm going to rewind. he says: "those who learn nothingfrom unpleasant events and a course in miracles says: "what you call a test..." "i was sent a test..." maybe you think this is an exam. what you call testare lessons you haven't learned

which life gives you againand again until you learn, in other words,until you transcend them. i'm getting through,right? i'm just askingif i'm getting through, i'm not asking youto agree with me. i'm giving you an opportunity.transcend your lives, dear people. bless him who you curse.bless him who you complain of. because they arethe true treasure of your lives. and then go in peace.

if he keeps doing the same thing...you know? go in peace. because you've learned. if someone doesn't respect you,respect yourself. and if they still don't respect you,do something to stop it happening. but don't go with resentment,with anger, with rage. because the next relationshipyou have will be different. do you know how many womenand men have told me that? bah... if i had a eurofor every time i've heard that, i wouldn't have to work any more.

hundreds of peoplehave told me that. a load of people. ok. the law of the mirror. is the message clearabout mirrors? you either recognise yourselfor reject yourself. you see that?you get the picture? you recognise yourself or reject yourself. decide. it's up to you.

let's see some conflicts.now we're getting specific. i've set out 11 or so.yes, 11. first i'll give a summary. basically to see if someoneresonates with them. well, there was a ladywho resonated with the butt thing. later maybeshe can explain it to us. i'll get them to stop the video, don't worry.it won't get shown. "i've got a cervical cyst."

"i can't get pregnant." "i love someone who doesn't want me,and i don't want someone who loves me." "my partners can't commit." "my partner does nothingall day." "i can't find a partner." "i don't know if i marriedmy husband or his mother." "i live with my wifeand my mother-in-law." "he treats me badly,but i can't leave him." "my partner takes drugs."

"when i had my second child,i stopped being interested in my partner." these are all phrasesi've had experience with. perfect. physical symptom: ovarian polyps. you see, when we are notin tune with our partner this will manifestin our body. almost always. ovarian polyps.

and her complaint is"lack of commitment." and the situation is: that's what she says. i fall in love with someoneand he won't commit. and the person i don't likedoes commit to me. obviously, it's very clear. if the other doesn't exist,who isn't committed to themselves? me. remember the polarities,

and attracting and rejecting. when i'm presented witha positive polarity, i present positive. they repel each other. if it's negative,the other presents in negative. there's always rejection. i always find myselfand i have an excuse for not committing. ok? fine.

we look for that information,obviously, i'm not going to explain the whole case, it's very long,because there's a resonance. that woman isn't unlucky.do we agree? she always findsthe same thing. the one she likeswon't commit, and the one she doesn't likewants to marry her. the question: she doesn't get married.this is the final result. and we see that her grandmothershad partners they didn't love and had a lot of children.

it sounds like thosemarriages of convenience. they are in love with other men,but they have to marry other men. and those women are withmen they don't love, but they have sexand children with them. you know?this is information. "i'm with someone i don't...love." and they suffer having children from unwanted relationships. and she repairs it.she doesn't have children.

and she continues withthe same programme: "i'm with someone who resonates with me,but i resonate against them." of course, there's more.when i explained it, she told me: "it's true. and one day i decided that,although... i didn't love that guy, i was going to live with him,because at least he loved me." you know?an intelligent girl. she thought about it.

i said: "well,you're going to be an old maid." so if this guy loves me,i'll go with him. and when she got pregnant,she had two abortions. she couldn't have childrenwith that partner. and you'd say:"what's wrong with that woman?" i want you to understand that it'sa resonance from her grandmothers. you get it? you know? she isn't good, or bad, or a killer,or guilty, or anything like that. i don't know if i'm explaining it well.it's being aware.

when she did it,she was very relaxed and calm. she said:"i thought i was a monster." and i said: "what are you talking about,that isn't true." this is a resonance.the resonance of her grandmothers. they had a lot of childrenwith men they didn't love. and you go with a man you don't love,you get pregnant, but you can't stand having a childwith that man. she said: "it's something that possessed me."i said: "it's this. and that's all.don't ask me ‘now what?'

now you're at peace,other things will come into your life." as simple as that. that's called transcendence.it's called forgiveness. understanding. it's something higher. you don't have to do anything. you don't have to pray,or go on a pilgrimage, to santiago or mecca. you don't have to do anything.you have to transcend. you have to understand.you have to forgive.

yes? another case. "cervical cyst." cervical cysts are very common,i've seen a lot of cases. the uterus is the entranceto the holy grail. what is the holy grail?don't you know the da vinci code? the chalice.what is the holy chalice? the uterus. the cervixis the entrance to the holy grail. the most sacred.

the most intimate. it's where the woman, the female,allows to enter only what should enter. it's a sensitive area. women get many diseasesof the cervix. and cysts have to do with:"i feel dirty. i'm in a relationshipthat makes me feel dirty. or i feel like a prostitute. or i realised my partnerwas with someone else.

i'm not the chosen one." still following?we have to look for the story. this lady was complainingabout the same thing. i've presented two similar casesso you see the complaints are the same, but the programmescan be very different. and they complain of the same thing."lack of commitment," she says. "men have troublecommitting." and then we discover... that when she's with men

she doesn't love,but she desires, in the end she feels dirty,you know? listen carefully. it's a feeling,it's how she lives it. she doesn't understand this.she says: "i slept with him because the guyis totally hot." but when she's done it,she feels dirty. so there's a programme hereof prostitution, and we find it. her grandmother had to become aprostitute to feed her children.

you know?and this is the information she receives. "what's wrong?"-"nothing, my child. now when you find a guy,you can sleep with him, you can have a great time, and now you know:‘don't worry, grandma, it's ok.'" the problem isn't... the unconscious, dear people,has an untouched innocence. it's incapable of judging. we judge ourselvesand add the feeling, you know? but the problem is we haveexperiences we don't understand.

and this young lady, obviously,won't commit, and the men who approach heronly want sex, because she has a programmeof prostitution, you follow? do you get it?prostitution. when we talk about itand put it into words, it's always very uncomfortablebecause you can never say what you mean. if you want to mend something... how do you mend something?by living it. if you don't live an experiencelike someone else's, how can you mend it?

it's like talking about bullfighting,how to do it, if you've never been in the ring. this is the same. if you really want to mend somethingfrom somebody else, transcend something, if you want to free someonefrom guilt, you need to havethe experience and not judge it. as simple as that.you know? so the partners ofthese women are perfect for understanding that they havea resonance that drives them towards certain experiences, and makes themdo it not to upset them,

but so that they can clean upthat information, transcend it, and can settheir descendants free. this is called being a healeror a world-saver. your faces... how's it going?is this a weight or does it free you? of course. now if you play at"i'm this, the other person is that,men are all alike, men just want one thing,"we have god looking

for the archangel: "goand find her men who are all alike." because the universal consciousnessis not dual. if you say: "i don't want coffee." then you'll get coffee."i don't want coffee." you'll get coffee. it reminds me of a friend: "i want a child! i want a child!i want a child!" sorry, i mean "i want a daughter!i want a daughter!" there's a thing. one day i found himcrying like a condemned man, and i knew his wifewas pregnant.

"jeez, what's wrong with you?"-"it's a boy!" "but what's wrong?is something wrong with your wife?" "no, no, no.but i want a daughter." and i said:"this is too much. let's see. buck up. this isn't normal. you're crying as ifyour wife had died..." he'd given me a fright,because i found him in the street and i thought somethingterrible had happened.

his wife had died,or the baby... no, no, it was because it was a boy. then we discoveredin his information a brother of hishad drowned. and a brother of his motherhad also drowned. you follow?and they were both little boys. for his unconscious,to have boys means losing them. his tears weren't his tears,they were his mother's and his grandmother's. do you follow, dear people?

it was an extreme case. well,his wife got pregnant again, and it was a girl."oh, a girl, how nice." and the other day he sent me a photo:"our second son is born." yikes! this guy over hereis a joker. you don't want any? have two. and he tells his wife: "you asked for it,you're going to have three men at home."

and i thought: "yes, but having aboy or a girl is decided by the man, not the woman." but i didn't want to upset him,so i didn't say it. i kept quiet. but he was projectingonto his wife: "this woman in his mind makes boys." and i thought:"oh, here we go." yes, that's how we work. that's how we work. ok.let's move on. come on.

what does this have to dowith partners, you may ask. psoriasis on hands and knees. "my husband doesn't look afterour daughter." oh really? she said:"not even when she's ill." in these words: "my husbanddoesn't look after our daughter when she's ill." i said: "ok.and when she isn't ill?" she said: "he doesn't then either.he just doesn't look after our daughter."

perfect. fine. this woman felt trappedin her maternal role and realised she didn't wanther husband to be the father of her children. and this came from her grandmother,who abused her children, because she hated her husbandand repudiated them. see where theinformation comes from. she was forcedto marry a man. she hated the manshe was married to. i know a case where a womanhated her husband so much

she terminated 15 children, 15 abortions.i won't go into detail. but they weren't all abortions. she hated him that much. and we knew about thisbecause the person who came to see me had a really extreme pathologyagainst men. i said: "there's something here,you're carrying some incredible story." the same thing happened to this woman. her grandmother abused her childrenbecause she hated...

it's typical: she hated the manand abused the children. so she took out the repulsion she felttowards her husband on the children. obviously she had inherited this,so what did she do? she is very motherly.very motherly. and her husbandmay well be a really good person, but she sees him as someonewho has to protect children, and he should be protectingher children. but she doesn't realise thather husband doesn't protect their children because she won't let him,which she had to become aware of.

so you can seewhat partners are for. so you can see. in the end we are always resonating. we always find ourselveswith the same other... what is happening here? there is a lot of pain and sufferingin couples. but it doesn't come directlyfrom the partner. partners confirminformation. they are complementaryso someone can be enlightened

and transcend that suffering,and set their children free. ok? another case. physical symptom: none. complaint: "i can't find a partner." i say: "oh really? have you never had a partner?" she says: "well, yes, 15."-"well..." "and i've been marriedand i have two children." for someone who can't find a partner...

but look at how people respond:"i can't find a partner." fine. then the questionis always the same. if you say you can't find a partner,you're not really saying you can't find a partner,but, what's wrong with the partners you found to make you sayyou can't find a partner? that's how these things work. and in this case,she also complained of the same thing. that they were justfor sex. another case.

this is a good one. "allergy to pollen, to dog hair,to horse hair..." and also -it isn't written here,but i remember- i ask her: "do you have hormonal problems?"she says: "yes, i've got metrorrhagia." i say: "ok." i ask her:"how are things with your husband?" answer:"everything is fine with my husband." and then i ask: "when did these symptoms start?

what was the situation?"and she says: "one day i found out my husband had sex with a friend of my son's...in our house." everything is fine with your husband, eh?ok. i say: "you justify this relationshipand think it's ok, but your body is telling you you have serious problems." now i remember a very similar onewith the same partner.

she married a man, and a few weeks later,he sleeps with her friend. i ask her: "and where is this guy now?"she says: "no, i still live with him." i say: "do you know the pathologyyou're complaining about? your uterus has been removed. why do you think they had toremove your uterus? very simple.i don't want to have children with this man." obviously, i'm summarisingthe cases, you understand. but so you realisethat here, for example,

there are lots of women,as usual... i must owe them something,i don't know why. i hope that sooni can pay back all the debt. but women are lucky. their hormonal system is very responsiveto partner conflicts. don't ignore anyhormonal symptoms because they'retelling you something. just a little advice. another case. three slipped discs.

and the complaint: "i have a partnerbut we haven't had sex for five years." and she says: "i don't want to leave himbecause he's old and i feel sorry for him." ok. the one to feel sorry for is you.i didn't say that. why do you think she hada slipped disc here? biological. if i have a slipped disc here,i can't move. i can't arch my back,or move my butt. and if you're a man, you can'tdo this movement either. you keep still,because if you do this everything hurts.

you get it? these thingsaren't random. and as she had a programmefrom her grandmother who got pregnant with a manshe didn't love and had 8 kids, for her there's no love in sex. and she would say things like:"don't have sex, don't have sex..." so what does she do?what her grandmother tells her. in the end, our relationships... how's it going?- good.

fine, fine, no? everyone's thinking:"what have i got that hurts?" in the end, our relationshipswith ourselves are confirmed by who we're with,and these are also resonances. i find people... why did she look for a manmuch older than her? to not have sex. the unconscious, i repeat,has an untouched innocence. in the end it gives youwhat you're always asking for.

but she has the illness. if she has the illness,it's because really, she does want sex, and there's damagebecause she doesn't have it. but the programme is in charge. you know?you have to become aware. in fact,she isn't married to her husband. she says: "i don't want to leave himbecause he's old and i feel sorry for him." much older than her.about 20 years older.

so i told her:"you're missing out." is it worth it to her? i doubt it. and now another. how's it going?feeling uncomfortable? yes? yes? no?that's good. fine. another case. and the complaint:"my husband doesn't look after me." this woman has breast cancer.and she's still with the same partner. i don't care if she stays with himor not, it's all the same to me.

but don't go accusing himof not looking after you. "my husband doesn't look after me." i said: "i'm sure your husband loves you,but he doesn't love you like you want him to love you likeyou want him to love you." that's complicated.but that's how it is. "i'm sureyour husband loves you." besides, i said her: "your husband is perfect.he's the perfect man. look and see what's wrong with him." so then she realises that her husbandis monopolised by his mother.

and i really mean it,monopolised. before he goes home,he goes to his mother's. and when she got pregnant, when she got pregnant, her husband cheated on her. and she's still with this person. the problemisn't about staying with him or not staying with him. the problem is,if you don't transcend, if you don't learn,

the illnesswill still be there. the unconscious doesn't careif you stay with him or not. but you have to transcendall that information, another case. very interesting."bartholin's gland." do you know whatbartholin's gland is? you're women, eh? yes? it doesn't matterif men don't know, because it's somethingwomen have. bartholin's gland isa gland at the entrance

to the vagina. it has one function:lubrication. because without lubrication,that's going to hurt. if the bartholin's glandis inflamed, what happens? if it's inflamed,you know there's no penetration. because it swells and hurts a whole lot. the biological meaningof this illness is: "i don't want to belongto any man."

and when i feel that a manwants to possess me, not in the physical sense,he wants to possess me, i can make this happen. so we explore,and we see... she complains and says: "i want sex, i don't want a man."she wants to have sex. and all the men she meetswant to marry her. well, we've already explainedhow it works. her parents went to germanyand left her with her grandmother.

so listen carefully.the story is amazing. when she heard the story...well, she knew it, she told me it. but when she became aware of it,she was amazed. she is the child of a couplewho went to germany. they had this little girl,my client, and they left her with her grandmother. she didn't see her mother for years. and this story reallyresonates with her. so i can't get marriedto a man and have kids,

because they'll be abandoned. but she does want sex.ok? and she always ends up with menwho want to marry her. and this is very curious, she lives alone, with threecastrated male cats. i always ask:"who do you live with?" they tell me:"with whoever." "are there any animals?"-"yes, there are." "which?"-"three cats."

"and how are your cats?"-"castrated". "castrated, you say? ok."-"of course, you have to..." "yes, yes. castrated.don't worry." complaint: "my partners get very close,but when i want to formalise the relationship they leave." this woman was marriedto a man who didn't let her do anything at all. he stopped her going out. her parents hate each other.

her mother is very dominantand her father is very submissive. the woman is violentto the man. and this is repair, because the grandmotherwas very much dominated by her husband. he was a military man,and he was always in charge. so there is informationthat women have to dominate their men. so men get close. but her information is:if you get close... she's a black widow spider,this young lady.

so men get close,she's a very attractive girl, but her unconscious says:"keep away." because she carries informationabout castrating men. becoming aware.that's all it needed. endometriosis and uterine fibroids. the complaint: "there's something wrongwith the men who approach me." what is the biological meaningof endometriosis? basically it's"i don't have a home." i explained this to a colleagueand she told me:

"it's funny. i have a friendwith endometriosis and she tells me she can't have children. i'm married to a man,today we're here, tomorrow there..." you don't have a home to have children in?endometriosis. and uterine fibroids is the same thing.it's not having children. you'll note i'm talking aboutphysical symptoms and they are all partner conflicts. you see that? that's why i wanted to explainthat the physical symptom

is what tells us most about ourconflict with our partner. and we go on to a physical conflictwhen we really don't know how to resolve an emotional conflict.am i getting through? if i have an emotional conflictwith my partner and it goes on, it persists, it will end upmanifesting in a physical conflict. this is how our unconscioussends us warnings. first you havethe emotional conflict. and then, if nothing changes,it ends up... the woman who hadvery heavy periods:

"i want to get someone out of my family,who do i want to get rid of?" my partner, of course. and that's what she wasreally saying to me. it's what she was telling me. "can't you seewhat you're telling me?" situation: the partner doesn't work,he lives with his parents. not working, not studying. she wants to leave and he says:"i'll kill myself if you leave me." so kill yourself.we'll bury you.

don't worry.if you commit suicide we'll bury you. so...her father castrated by the grandmother, married her motherbecause the grandmother told him to. and she got marriedbecause her grandmother said so. all the men are immature,they can't cope by themselves. everything they found isimmature men, because they believethey can't hack it. the last one.physical symptom: none. and the person says:"i repeat the pattern of the partner."

and i answer: "i don't understand.you have to be more specific. that's like telling me the wallsare always painted the same colour." i want you to understandhow you talk. she says: "i repeat the same patternin partners." i say: "ok. as if you told mein your house all the walls are the same colour,can you tell me which one?" yes or no? fine.so i reframe it and she says: "well, all my partners don't haveany money or stability." fine. perfect.i reframe it again:

"what do you meanwhen you say they don't have money or stability?" she says: "they don't work or they'realways changing jobs." see how i'm leading herto be more precise. because if we keep togeneralities... make a note,because we all do this. we always have general answers.we don't get into details. "i just can't stand my husband." and you leave it there."i can't stand my husband."

"nobody can everstand my husband." and to her friend: "nobody can everstand my husband." my question is: "what is ityou can't stand about your husband?" "i can't stand himbecause he does this or this." "ok. and the thing he does,how does it resonate with you, how do you experience it?" you must always reflect.do you follow, dear people? fine. i'll go on. "ok. give me an exampleof a good partner you had." first phrase. people areso eloquent...

she says: "i didn't like him."i say: "i can imagine." people on jupiter could imagine that.we can work that out. and after more questions,she tells me: "he abused mepsychologically." i don't accept the concept"he abused me psychologically." there is abuse or there isn't.is that clear? and i say:"and your last partner?" she says:"a little psychological abuse." that's like saying the first one hit mefive times a day and the second only two.

ok.you're in the same story. you see that? they justify themselves:"this one doesn't hit me so much." and it goes on. what do we see?she doesn't value herself. as she doesn't respect herself, she findsmen who don't respect her. is that clear?yes. fine. resonance: she looks for sonsinstead of men. if she complains... listen to me carefully.what do you complain about? if you complain that your mandoesn't work and is immature,

who falls in love with these men? who resonates with these men? did someone point a gun at your headto make you be with him? this is your resonance.you look for a type of man. you see what i'm getting at?we don't judge here. we just teach that here what you findis what you were looking for. and then you complain.but it's what you were looking for. so all her partnersare younger than her. they're like adolescents.what is she looking for? children.

where did that come from?her grandfather didn't want daughters. he just wanted a son. and she has a programme,because they had daughters. they didn't have a son.her grandmother suffered a lot because of it. and this is how the grandmothertransmits this to the granddaughter and the granddaughterjust looks for sons. she doesn't look for men.you know? i know what i'm explainingis very irrational. but i always tell a storyabout my wife, to explain.

my daughter,who is not biological, but calls me father because i've beenher father for 30 years, says to me: "dad, why do i alwaysfall in love with men who can be ugly or handsome,but have long eyelashes? i can't resist them." this is an engram.i say: "this is your mother's fault." and while she's distracted,i say: "darling, was there a manin your life with long eyelashesand very handsome?"

she says: "oh yes!" now you can ask her,daughter. so she asks her,and her mother tells the story. she says: "yes. well, i didn't loveyour father. i didn't love your father. i don't even knowhow i got pregnant. but i remember the dayi had sex with your father and got pregnant,i was thinking of this man, his eyes and his eyelashes."

and this imagewas imprinted on her. and she saw menwith eyes like that everywhere. and she fell in love with that. it isn't a joke. i'm explaining a storyfrom my life to show you how useful this can be. you know? when the grandmother sufferedbecause the grandfather hated daughters and they just haddaughter after daughter.

that suffering remained,passed on to the mother, to the daughter, and the daughter passed it on... you already know sins are inheritedup to the 3rd and 4th generation. the 2nd just passes it on. here, this is for you. and with this order, she only looked for menwho were like children. and all the people shemixed with were younger, quite a lot younger than her.

she understood, and that's all.when light dawns, everything changes. you know? ok.i'm going to finish up. i wanted to explain these 11 casesso you could see how they work. blocks in our way. i'm not going to mention all of them,but some blocks. "you get used to it." you know?"well, what can you do." "better the devil you know." boring too,but never mind. "you sleep, you justify yourself."so justifications...

some classic phrasesi've heard over the years. "but i love him very much." when you say you love and suffer,you expect something in return. however much you love himis how much you don't love yourself. when you put up with frustration,violence, abuse, etc., and your answer is:"but i love him very much," however much you sayyou love him is how much you don't love yourself.

not a gramme more or less. and you have an experiencethat the only thing life teaches you is to stop blaming yourself,stop feeling like a victim and begin to love yourselfand respect yourself. another one. "i'm afraid of being alone." and i ask them:"how do you feel now?" they say: "lonely".-"so leave him." fine. another one.

"if it wasn't for his shouting,i would be happy." and my question:"so why do you put up with the shouting? what for?" these are questions i ask,self-examination questions. i don't want answers. sometimes i say: "can you see yourselfgrowing old with this man or woman?" "no, no, no. don't say that." i always remember a ladywho told me a story and i asked her: "can you see yourselfgrowing old with this man?

can you see yourself as an old woman?" she stood up,gave me a hug and left. years later she metmy wife and said: "every day when i get upi thank god for enric's self-examination question,and every day i pray to god for enric. lord, thank you for bringing meto this guy who said something that annoyed me,but was very good for me. because i got out of there,i got a divorce, and a month later i meta wonderful man

who treats me like a queenand every day when i get up i say, lord, thank youfor the question you asked me." this is what gives you the strength to carry on.this is what gives you strength. i don't know her. if you gave mea million euros, she could be here and i wouldn't recognise her,i don't remember. but there is a saying,"do good, it doesn't matter to whom." "but he's the father of my children." and i ask the self-examination question:

"is he the fatheryou want for your children?" fine. solutions and reflections.only for those who reflect. "never talk about the other person. always talk about yourselfor your relationship to the other." saying "my husband does this","my wife does that" is not the same as "what am i doing in relationto what he or she is doing?" "who am i in relation towhat he is doing?" not: "if my husband would do this,or my wife would stop doing that, i would be happier."

change your verbalisation and i promiseit'll change your life. you'll see it differently.cross my heart. but don't take my word for it.put it into practice. when you find yourselftalking about the other, stop. and think:"the other doesn't exist, he's my reflection." what am i seeingin the other that i don't like? what am i learningthrough the other? you know? let's continue. "the other will set you free or condemn you."

without your mirror, you can't know yourselfin the other as i said before. "we don't fall in love,we attract each other by resonance." i just killed romanticism. but you can continue resonatingwith your partners and you can resonate over a table with candles and musicand having great sex afterwards. full stop. resonate.exchange information. do a resonance scan. ok?and call it what you want. affair, love, life partner,life mirror... it doesn't matter.call it what you want.

"your judgements imprison youand stop you seeing your repressed guilt." this is a projection of guilt.watch out for judgements. if you observe your partner and don't judge,you'll see the truth. to see what it isyou have to learn, you must stop judging. it takes practice. it takes practice.this does need practice. but i can also promise you this.

when you have a polarity,you know? when you have another polarity,and you don't judge about "this is good"and "this is bad" and you detach and observe... have you seen those magic eye pictures,where if you look at a fixed point, a drawing appears in the middle? well, this is the same.boom! the solution appears. and this solutionis just for you. it's not for sharing.it's your solution. ok?

you don't have to call your neighbourand tell her: "you have to do this." no. this is just for you. even if she seems to bein the same situation. "always ask yourself: why am ihaving this experience? this could be the solutionto a chronic problem." why am i going through this? "you have relationships to transcendopposite qualities, complement each other, create a point of integration and then you'll be freeto do what you want."

this is what i teach people. once you see it, you feel it,don't tell anyone, do it. yes? in the end everythingcan be summed up: the only relationship you need to healis with yourself. thank you very much. well, just a bit more. you've seen i was on time.my timing was being monitored. i could have gone on for longer,but i hope everything was clear... when rubã©n said to me:"if there are only 15 or 16...".

i said: "for that many i can doa really long talk." i just want to say thatyou don't have to believe this. you have to practice it. the truth that sets us freeis not a truth anyone can tell you. the truth that sets you freeis the truth you live, you experienceand you transcend. there's nothing betterin this world than observing everything without taking a position. you can like one thingand not like another.

but if you like itthat doesn't mean it's good, and if you don't like itthat doesn't mean it's bad. we learn more from thingsyou don't like or you hate than from things you like. so we learn from everything.ok? when you go through lifeand start to relate to the person who is your partner, be aware that your relationshipwith that person is the relationship you'll projecton all the other couples

around you, and in the endwe'll create a society, which will be freeror less free, depending on how coupleslive with each other.

por que da el cancer de mama

hello! hi! hi! good afternoon! hello! good afternoon! good, as we always say,thanks for coming. so, what’s in store today? today, we have blood,sweat and tears. there may be vomit and diarrhoea too,but i can't guarantee that. it's going to be a talk,it's already a talk…

it's going to be a tough one. it’s a talk with a certain continuity. so if you’ve seen my videos, they have a common theme. the idea is to awaken. awaken. but not awakenin a very spiritual sense, of somethingvery difficult to achieve, of somethingwe have to do great things for,

great pilgrimages or whatever. or go without sleep, or sleep lots.no. it’s very simple, much more simple. as simple as reaching consciousness that we are in robot mode. we’re in robot mode, which means that we think, when in fact, our thoughts think us.

and one of the keysto their keeping us asleep and therefore preventing usfrom waking up is the most intimate relationshiparound. and the most intimate relationship around is the one betweenparents and children and step-parents. so, really, this is a talk that has nothing to dowith "me and my parents" or "my parents and i", because it is highly likelythat if you’re not a father

you might be one day. so for the unconscious,for the non-dual, non-linear consciousness, the fact that you are a childmeans nothing. nor does the fact you're a parent. because those of us who are parentshave been children and we're parents too. right? hey you, i don't know how you do it

but you always manage to sitin the first row. this guy stalks me. i see him everywhere. i'll be dreaming about you soon. i see him wherever i go. so, as i was saying. so, yes, the idea of "me and my parents"or "my parents and i", is something we need to debunk.

it needs debunking and fast. because everything we've builtaround the parent-child relationship is a lie. a lie. to give you an exampleof what i’m saying... if you’re a buddhist,you think like a buddhist. if you’re a muslim,you think like a muslim. if you’re a catholic,you think like a catholic. but that only means one thing:you’re asleep.

in other words,your beliefs think for you, they condition your life. and this is the big thing. in other words,my talks have a purpose, which is this: for us to realisethat we are not ourselves; we are our conditioning and we are these programmesthat we have inherited from our culture,

when we were in the womb and we have inherited informationfrom our parents. it is writtenthat the sins of our parents will be inheritedup to the third or fourth generation. now, what does this mean? from a dual perspective: why is it my faultthat my parents were idiots? or that they sinned? from a non-linear, non-dualpoint of view,

information cannot be lost. we always inherit the information. we inherit physical information,to give it a name, or biological... and the information we inherit that makes us live thingsa certain way. on one level, information is notlost, as you’ll see over the course of today. right. this talk lends itself a lotto doing something that is not

the goal, which is to feel guilty and justify oneself. ok? to give you an example, i'm going to begin with a teacher,a secondary school teacher. someone goes to see herbecause she has an autistic son. and the person says to her, she says, "i’ve come to seewhat we can do for my son.”

and the specialist says to her, “do? do...? i can't do anything, until you realise what programming,what information you are carrying and which your son has inherited. so, this herehas nothing to do with your son. the most important part,where we need to reach consciousness, is you." and her response was,

“oh, so i’m to blame?” right?wrong. nobody's to blame. is that clear? if we have to lay the blame somewhere, we can say it was adam and eveand breathe a sigh of relief. but i don't think it's like that. is it? good, so we're not guilty.

nobody is guilty. and obviously, we need to reach consciousnessabout the fact that, i repeat, my way of thinking is very closely connectedto the information i have received. this is what we’ll talk about today. all clear? very well, you've been warned. let’s see if this changes,

right now i don't knowif it's changing or not. it’s not my controller. there it is: “me and my parents." ok. let's see, where do i point? this thing doesn't change. let's see, now.there you go. i'm going to start with somethingthat anthony de mello said. for those of you who don't know,

he was – i say was becausehe's no longer with us – a jesuit monk, so a catholic, but ratzingerwho went about saying that he had a few screws loose. so, he’s not a priest who... his teachings aren't catholic, they're more teachings for everyone. so he doesn't fit squarelyinto the definition of catholic. that's what i mean.

take note. there’s a study led by ratzinger,who was the pope, which says that the teachingsof anthony de mello are really very important, but they’re not catholic. pardon my french but,"shit, that's what he wanted.” that's what he wanted.he says, “they’re for everyone.” of course. so, he's a jesuit priest

educated in catholicism, but his teachingsare a bit out of place. where... he was born in 1931 in bombayand died in 1987. i think he had a heart attack. so, what this guy says... he's quite avant-gardewhat we call nowadays 'a modern thinker'. he talked about programmingand deprogramming

so, anthony de mello says, “if you don't hateyour mother and your father, you won't be yourselfand you won't be able to follow them.” that's what he says. if you don't hateyour mother and your father. luke says, “if anyone comes to me and does notdetest his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters,

yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple.” how are we to interpret this? hate mum and dad?detest them? and anthony de melloteaches us this and tells us, “it refers to the programmingthat we’ve received from our parents that we are unableto break free from. as if the culture of our parentsanswered for us." and this is preciselywhat we came here to do today.

to gain consciousness of this. our parents, obviously,we don't doubt that they loved us. they loved. but what must we understandby "for our parents to love us"? and this is what we're going toreveal in this talk. what does matter is thatwe reach consciousness of this: that hating or detestingour parents, clearly,does not mean our parents themselves but the information that,because of them,

we have received and whichconditions our lives. and he clarifies, “this is not inconsistent withthe fourth commandment, which says, “honour your father and mother.” honouring our parents,in this case, means that if i can deprogramme myself,if i can wake up, i am honouring my parents. everybody with me? "a course in miracles" says,

“it is writtenthat the sins of our parents shall be inheritedto the third or fourth generation.” a very cruel statementat the judgement of the ego. but i tell you this, my son, the holy spiritwill reinterpret this teaching, and say, "you can free your parents up to the third or fourth generation.” this is honouring them.

dishonouring them is: your parents projecttheir limitations on to your life and you live by and feed them, passing them on to your children, who, in turn, live by and feed them. with me? because this is the starting point. it's the starting point.this is the crux of the matter. what it is:

either we see itfrom a dual point of view, or we see itfrom a non-dual point of view, and by dual point of view,we need to understand: i am separate from everything; and by non-dual point of view:i am connected to everything. and we are told thisby the great spiritual teachers. and nowadays,science, with quantum physics, with the quantum consciousness, so, honouring our parents

does not mean obeying them "per se". because our parentscould be making a big mistake. and we have no rightto maintain that mistake. as they say... they say that love is blind. but love is not blind. what is blind is the programmingwe carry with us. what we call "loving". "parents love their childrenunconditionally."

this is a myth. and as such, it needs debunking. this has conditioned our lives so much that we do thingswe don't want to do, live experienceswe don't want to live, and the answer is:"because they’re my parents". the people who say thistend to be ill or have big problemsthat we’ll explain in detail today. so, we need to distance ourselvesfrom these myths once and for all.

clearly, our parentshave shortcomings, of their own, and obviously,like we ourselves have had. but somebodyneeds to take action in the matter, and this is preciselywhat we are doing: reaching consciousnessof something we must do. from a dual point of view,i can't do anything. from the point of viewof quantum consciousness, if i change, the information changes.

at least the information is there. and changing the information puts it intothe collective unconscious, the family unconscious,and someone will use it. ok?ok. clearly, there are peoplewho don't know how to love, who do not love themselves, and do not forma healthy bond with their children. let's talk about toxic parents.

we are all toxic. some, a little toxic. others, a lot. but we're all toxic. we are toxic. and we do this... i've only put a few ways up there,i could have put a huge list up, but a few words sufficefor the good listener. toxic parents have the powerto undermine your self-esteem,

destroy your confidence, generate links of dependency, suffocate you with their love,insult you, and even hit youand belittle you. and we could go on. and who has never done that? above all,i’m referring to parents. but what about the children...? who hasn't felt that mum and dadsaid something to you,

something like, "well, if you come, then..."? who hasn’t felt guilty? who hasn't felt the obligation? who’d tell their mother to go to hell?how could i send her to hell! she's as irritating as hell. she's always calling "yes yes, no no",she calls non-stop! every day: “i’m fine, mum” “i’m fine, mum”

"what can i do? she's my mother." well, i’d reflect on the self. normally,the victim is the real victimiser. it's the other way round. if i slap you around: “if i slap you,you’ll know what's what." if i slap her and she doesn't go,i'm going to give her another. and if she stays, i’ll do it again,because i think she likes it. right, let's carry on.

so, toxic parentsexpress themselves in two ways: with an excess of the negativeand with an excess of the positive. with an excess of the negative: these are the ones who criticise you,who question you, who tell youwhat you should and should not do. sound familiar? they don't support you unless you dowhat they think you should. and they areemotionally absent parents. they are there,but they're not there.

they’re not there when you need them. because they alwayshave more important things to do. then there’s the excess positive: they pine for their childrenand don't let them breathe. they are always on at them. their children want independence butthey make them depend on their love. they treat their adult childrenas if they were kids. some more so than others. all this is just the introduction.

right now i'm just introducing. i’ll go in for the kill later. we’re not going to leave it at this. it's just a warm-up for the neurons. get ready for what's about to come,in a little while! let's move on. what are the consequencesof this excess positiveness or excess negativeness? let's take a look.

emotional dependence. immature adults. fear of disapprovalfrom their parents. they live with guilt. they have a love-hate relationshipwith their parents. another one. fear of commitment. fear of suffering. fear of loneliness.

fear of abandonment. people who, after seeingwhat they’ve seen in their homes, don't want to repeat the patterns so they don't commit. “i don't want to suffer.”sound familiar? "i don't want..." and other people put up with all sortsof relationships out of fear of loneliness. this expressionis the most pathetic of all.

because, of course,one can never truly be alone. when someone is afraid of being alone, it’s clear that he is not himself. it's very clear, becauseif he really listened to himself he’d realise that he doesn’t dowhat he really want to. but all this, all this,doesn't come from us. but the factthat it’s not from us doesn’t mean that we are not responsible.

it doesn't come from us. we were brought up like this. we've been conditioned. but that doesn’t mean:“well, what can i do?” "it’s nothing to do with me." we have a responsibilityto transcend this information. addictive relationships. staying in toxic relationshipsthat lead to violence as a consequenceof one’s own insecurities.

i’m getting ahead of myself a bit now. i'm going to jump forward a bitbecause i want to. look. i have to leap forward. there’s something important. if the world were... i really don't know... i don't get why the world gets upin arms about what i’m going to say, when it’s been provenagain and again.

if our parents were conscious,if they had been awakened as to the importance of relations, in other words,the ambience in the family nest, of its vital importance for the psychoemotional developmentof our children, for their development as adultstomorrow, so they don't turn intodrug addicts or alcoholics, or for themto be non-violent people, or non-submissive people,

if parents... at the end, i’m going to repeat a few words from a juvenile judge who says, "sometimes i want to lockthe parents up." and i think:"how right you are, my man." and other times he saysto the delinquent children: “get out of here,get your parents in, i'm going to give thema piece of my mind."

look, i’m not going to accept– and it's not acceptable – because it’s unthinkable,unsatisfactory and intolerable – to say"oh, my kids turned out bad". not acceptable. this is the greatest violencethat we can commit towards humankind. to say, "how is it my faultthat god sent me these children." and what about you? do you think that you'rea pure and immaculate filter?

that your children came here and were unsoiledby the shit you carry with you from these toxic programmes you’ve been feeding yourselfall your life? from these dependent,addictive relationships with your father, your mother,and your partner? why do you thinkthese children are here? perhaps you think your children... as mothers say now,

"we wanted you very much." "but if you wanted me?""well..." as my mother would say,"god sends us children." wow! of course, since childrencome from god... it was nothing to do with me. me? god sends the kids. but you play a part, don't you? it’s like saying,"dear lord, let me win the lottery."

i think that was a catalan. i say that because it’s a stereotype. no mind; i’m catalan anywayso i just laugh at myself. the guy prays for a month or two, "lord, what about the lottery?" i have great faith in you." and in the end god says to him, "look, are you going to buy a ticket? just buy the damn ticket, would you?"

well this is the same thing. god sent them to me. this is only the preamble of a talk i’m going to do in mexico. it’s going to be revolutionary. it's called: "the power of mothers." i'm only doing a preamble. "the power of mothers." i’m getting ahead a bit,

if this world has to change,we need to start with mothers. why? because we all come outof the same hole. yes. and we spend nine monthsinside this woman. and what do you think? if my mother’s happy,won’t my son be happy? and if my mother suffers,won't my child suffer? and if my child is unwantedand i want to have an abortion,

is absolutely nothinggoing to happen to this baby? are we really so naive? you're with me, right? being a motheris the biggest thing there is. but it’s not a myth, mothers are human beingswho demand respect, as we all do. but they need to reachconsciousness, because, when it comes down to it,

even the egg, as science shows, even the egg chooses the spermthat does the fertilising. don't you think... it’s very chauvinistic to thinkthat the sperm arrive like this... head-butting their way in. it’s as if you were tryingto knock this wall down. it’s a resonance. the egg chooses the sperm. and it chooses it by resonance.

and what resonancedo you think this is? the emotional status of the mothers,of course it’s as simple as that. can you imagine living with a manyou don't love? or being in love with someone andbeing forced to marry someone else? don't you think our childrenare going to receive this information? if you only knewhow many cases we see of people who do not understandwhy their life is the way it is and when we make themreach consciousness of this,

at least they achieve peace! attachment is the big disease. and suffering is the result. well, buddha said that. attachment, the attachmentwe have to not being alone, for the one we love not to love us. so, when we fall in love... let’s translate the word accurately,to fall in love means:

“i want to possess you. i want you to be mine. i want you to be mine.” that’s falling in love. and so, because i'm afraid, "that slag of a neighbour betternot try and take him away from me", then i get jealous. and that's possessiveness. it’s a lack of self-love.

and where did this come from? suffering is a choice, it is the beliefthat i may be missing something. and this is where it all begins. two people very much in love, that’s very easy to say, very easy. what are the fears of these people? how do they live this love?

do i spend all day calling,asking you where you are and what you’re doing? what do you thinkwill happen to the children? they're going to be all“fraternitã© and libertã©â€? maybe. or maybe not. are you reaching consciousness? mothers who already are mothers and those who are going to be mothers,reach consciousness.

let's carry on. a reflection on the last statement: when we cry for a lossof whatever nature, why do we cry? for the other? you cry for yourself; it’s attachment. look, pain hurts. suffering is a choice.

and sufferingis directly related to attachment. there is no freer love than to live with someonein the present moment, every present moment,knowing that this could end tomorrow or in thirty years. in fact, when my wife and i met, – both coming from relationshipsthat had ended – we looked at each other andwithout knowing this

– because this was 30 years ago – we said, "hey, you've been hurt and so have i. so what say we stop promising eternal love,which is a load of old nonsense. because the only thing i know isthat right now i feel good with you.” but my wife will tell youthat i said to her, "for the record,i'm not in love with you.” "you're so unromantic.""well, i’m not.

i can assure youthat i feel that i'm with you, that i like you being with me, but i don't want to possess you." and i said, outside, on a starry night, i said, "do you see that star?" and she says, "yes." and i say,

"i'm going to that star. with or without you. you decide." that's love. to love is not to want to possess. love is not about projecting anythingon to the other person. love is sharing the present moment. and life gave us a son. we made him at christmas.

not because it was christmas, but because we made him at christmas,that's all. why am i telling you this? because, in reality,true love doesn't tie anybody down. when i listen to friends or colleagues or students who tell me that they had to asktheir husbands for permission to come i’m like “what?” how old are you?

are you underage? because if you are underageyou look pretty old. life has treated you badly. so when they say this to mei’m shocked. but they seem very uneasy. i say, "no, they’ve screwed your life up,darling. making you believe..." i’m just giving you an insightinto the talk i’m giving in mexico.

i'm going to go straight to the point. we live in a disgustingly chauvinistic– forgive my use of the word – world. it’s incredible.there's no escape from chauvinism. i realised how chauvinistici was by observing myself: "my god! how chauvinistic we are! they've drummed it right into us! well, then things happen as we know. is all this clear, family? let's get on then.

here we go. how do we live this absencefrom victimhood? "i suffer when you're not with me." "you don't do what i want." "i have to do it, they’re my parents." let's say that a woman – i say a woman because i’ve seenplenty of examples of this – finds out that her husband ischeating and she starts to cry. and i say, “why are you crying?”

“well, my husband, he's cheated on mewith someone else." i say,"you should be happy." "you always see everythingin such a positive light." "well, you can look at itfrom a victim stance, as in 'oh, poor me',– and i advise you not to – because, my dear, it's fantastic, you've found outthat this guy isn't faithful to you. so let him go.” "it's just that i feel so lonely."i say, "no.

as the saying goes,better off alone than in bad company. so, cheer up!because you’ll meet someone else. but i’ll tell you one thing: when you let this one go, the next onethat comes along will be the same. don't think they'll be different." are you following? and from freedom, as i explained, real love is not attachment. so you're with someone,you share that life with someone.

i once had a lady who said to me, "i want to get divorcedfrom my husband." and i said, "so get a divorce." and she said,"but he's done nothing wrong." and i say to her, “say that again?” "well, my husband takes care of me,pampers me, takes me out, here and there, but i don't love him.”

"so stop hurting him then", i said. “don't waste his time. he’ll find someone else andhe’ll make her very happy." but she was very concerned. "i want to get divorcedbut he's done nothing wrong." “he doesn't have to do anything.” see how we talk to each other. if he cheats, i get mad. if he doesn't cheat,but i don't love him,

i don't know what to do. well out of love and respect,you say to him, "look, thanks for everythingyou’ve given me, but find yourself another womanwho’ll make you happier, because i can't.” “what could happen?”“nothing. what's going to happen?” goodbye. that’s exactly how it is. great, let's carry on.

let's see some examplesand dig a little deeper. i’ll start with jorge bergoglio, pope francis. have you seen his biographyon canal+? obviously, he says it's a biography. i think his motherwanted him to be a doctor, so jorge goes to his motherand he says, "mum, i’m going to be a priest." you can imagine what she said.

his mother started breathing fire. jorge loves and respects his mother and honours his mother.right? but to honour one's mother does not mean doingwhat she forces you to do. that’s why i start with the pope. everybody following? he says to her,"well, i am going to be a priest." and his mother went a long timewithout speaking to him.

and for i don't remember how long,i think maybe about a year, she didn’t see him at all. and he wasn't about to goand see her because he knew she didn't wantto see him dressed as a priest. some time went by until one day,as the story goes, he was giving communionand his mother was there. that's love,love is accepting the other person's freedom. not to condition them to dowhat we want them to.

you see, one of the big problemsthat we screw up our kids up with is our crap,the crap that we project. i want my son to be what i couldn't. well, that's all very well,but don't screw him up. you have to be a doctor. or you have to study music. or you have to do whatever. and then we have peoplewho i've seen that have studied these things

and then given it upbecause it wasn't what they wanted. i think... i have a sister-in-law whose mother,so, my mother-in-law, insisted that she be a pharmacist,so she studied pharmacy, and when she finished,she dropped it. she finished pharmacyand studied to be a librarian. and my question is:all that time? did she do itwith every good intention? i’d swear it.

but it's written: "the road to hell is pavedwith good intentions.” and it leads to hell! instead of being with our children,observing their best qualities and encouraging them,whatever they are... "dad, i want to be artist.” "you won't earn a living from that." and we lose a great artist. "dad, i want to travel the world."

"but you can't do anything." i had to say this to a friend. he has a son who,through the family tree, is related to luis candelas. isn't he from round here? no, no, the character. but...we found out. luis candelas, who had a lover.well, one here and another there. anyway,the son bears all the information.

and the guy's free, like the wind. and his dad's like... got it? but, well, we’re friendsand he was like... "but your son's a gem." "he hasn't studied anything." "so what?don’t worry." well, he's taught them a lesson. he went to the northern countries.

it goes without saying thathe couldn't speak any languages, and he didn’t need to. he had a universal language,his friendliness, he radiates love, and sign language. but now the guy speaks english and a bit of the local language. and he said to his parents, “come and see me.”

listen to what i’m saying. because his parents had alreadylistened to me, and i'd said, “don't even call your son. he’ll call you. he knows you're here, right? so he’ll call." "ok, we’ll wait for our invite.” he worked as a cook. "you'll invite us.”

"yeah right, do you thinki've come here to earn 1,500 euros to take you out to dinnerwhich is expensive here?" well, he organised a party for them. but his parents were so proud. this is what i want to say,his parents were so proud because they saw that their childwas free like the wind. and they would have castrated him. do you understand? good.

a young manwants to be a psychologist and his mother tells himthat he has to be a doctor. he goes to enrol to be a doctor but when he's about to enrolto be a doctor, he says, “what the hell! i’m going to enrol in psychology." and his mother didn't speak to himfor six months. but one day, she saw how happyhe was studying psychology and, well, it melted her heart.

“i feel obligedto go to my mother's to celebrate her birthday." "i feel obliged." i say, "did your mother put a gunto your head?” “she makes me feel guilty.” “your mother makes you feel guilty?” “isn't it you who feels guilty and plays the blame game?” i’ll show you.

"what don't you likeabout your mother?” because what you don't likeabout your mother is in you. remember, we're not separate." “i have to call my motherevery evening. if i don’t, she gets mad.” and, of course, this gentleman'swife is delighted about it, you can't imagine how much. man with a phobiaabout leaving the house. his mother,never let him out when he was little.

never, she loved him so, so much, that she was afraid he'd fallover on the street and hurt himself. he's 50 years oldand still sleeps with his mother. a mother who, when she has a problemwith her partner, the first thing she doesis call her daughter. and then the daughterprojects this story, on to whom? her partner. that’s typical. sometimes, women tell me,

"i don't know if i married myhusband or my mother-in-law.” and the other way around. "well, it’s a package." a young man wants to leave home. he has to give the moneyhe earns to his parents. and he says,"but i want to leave home..." i’m the first to saythat if you’re in somebody's house – it's also in the criminal code, article 155, i know this because

the judge said so – when one is within the family nest, children have their duties. and as the judge says, "previously, children only had duties and few rights. and now, children have all the rights, but no idea of the duties they have." so we have created little monsters.

a son who resides in the family nesthas the duty to collaborate with the family,but this is not the case here. this guy wanted to leavebut his mother didn't want him to. she had him trapped. and she did a million thingsto make him feel guilty. until, in the end, he said to her, "mum, i’m saving to move out. if ever you have a problem, you can use the money i've saved,naturally."

"i’ll give it to you. if you have a problem,i’ll give you the money." he reached consciousness thathis parents were forced to hand over the money they earneduntil the day they got married. so, we can see that this child honoured his parents becausehe did not follow their programming. this is what i explained at thestart, everybody clear? he honoured his parentsbecause he did not do the same. but he also said,

"mum, dad… if ever you havea problem and need my help, i’ll give you the money, of course, but i want to be independent." and he was of the age to do so,clearly. let's get an understanding of this. to understand it, as i said earlier, we always need to ask a question, to ourselves as parents, and to our mothers as their children.

and the question is: what was the emotional statusof my parents when was i conceived? "what is the emotional status? this is why no two children are alike. because the momentwe are conceived is key. i call this the “da vinci code”, after the film of the same name. because the da vinci coderelates to the sacred chalice.

and my question is: what more sacred chalice can exist than that which createsthe miracle of life? well this one.not mine. the one that women have. the uterus. and the cervix is a chalice,the sacred chalice. that's where all the alchemyhappens. take note, as what i’m about to sayis very important:

just think how important our emotional state iswhen we create our children that it can transcend all information, no matter how toxic,from our ancestors. two parents who are absolute idiots, but when they make love and conceive a child, they love andrespect each other deeply. and they have this childand people will say, "how could these parentshave made a child like this?”

you know what i mean.right? well this is what i’m talking about.this got me thinking a lot. you know i’m very observant. and i was thinking,it could be the other way. how could these parentshave such a stupid child? where’s the answer? in the da vinci code. "with what emotional statewas i created?", if you ask your mothers,i’ll tell you now,

they’re all liars. mothers, not women. they all have to cover up;we’re educated to do this. to cover up. or they give the answers: "what did you want me to do,sweetie?" so you were conceivedwith pain, suffering, and heartbreak. you can have the most extraordinarygenetics from your parents,

but the key lies here. in that moment,let’s call it "magical", in the miracle of life, there. as nessa carey would say, "an egg without sperm is nothingand together they create a being." as we’re used to this,it may seem like “wham, bam!”. but it is actually highly conditionedby these emotional states. that’s one aspect. and the other is:

what is your parents’ relationshipwith their parents? your parents with theirs. because let’s not forgetthe third or fourth generations. so, how did your motherget on with hers? how did your mother get onwith her parents? because this is inherited. and it's amazing just how much. in other words, i've told this example before

but it doesn't make itany less important. so this woman gets pregnantbefore she's married. this has some negative connotationsin the unconscious, agreed? but the unconscious knows nothingabout illegitimate children. this is a scourge. it’s a belief. it sucks. in nature,there are no illegitimate children.

you’re a child or you aren't,end of story. so, they get married. she doubts that this man is the father of her child. this is how the boy was conceived. he was conceived like this. so, they get married and go on their honeymoonto tenerife. it didn't matter, they could have goneto pernambuco, but it was tenerife.

and when they’re in tenerife,she continues to insist that she doesn’t believe that this mancan be the father of this baby. it just doesn't sit right with her. so what happens? the sacred chalice starts to spit. and she has an attempted miscarriage. off to the hospital. when they get there the doctor says, "she’s having a miscarriage.the foetus is being rejected."

and then she sees her husband crying. he's crying. crying his heart out. with such sufferingabout the loss of his son that it touches his wife's heart. and when he was about to go in, she felt it, she didn't think. still with me? she felt that, wow,it was like a shock,

an emotional shockat her husband crying his heart out because he was going to lose his son. and that shocked her so much that when she was about to go into surgeryfor curettage, a doctor appeared. and she says, "he appeared like an angel." and he said, "what’s going on here?" and she said,

“well, this happened... "“let's see.” and he said,"there’s still a beat here." and the other doctor says,"but... the heart wasn't beating." “listen.” and it was beating. and a child was born. and when he was little,this boy said to his mother one day, "mum, when i grow upi want to go to tenerife.” and his mother said,

"why do you want to go to tenerife?" imagine, a little tadpole this big. "i don't know,but i have to go to tenerife." for this boy, tenerife is life. see how this works. now imagine that a woman gets pregnantand says, "oh shit, not now" and thinks about getting an abortion. i’m making you think, aren't i?

well, do. think, think. let's go into detail. if the father’s absentand the mother's very present this will probably happen. i speak from experience.we've confirmed it. a daughter will seekthe path of her mother and this can lead toemotional dependence, a love-hate relationship,yes, no... yes, no... and, among other things,i know this from experience,

from my sisters, anorexias and bulimiascan also appear. all these peoplestudying these diseases should ask themselves this. but science even says it. they should ask themselves this. another one: a child can gettoo obsessed with his mother, to the point that the motheroverprotects the child and projects on to himthe male who is not present.

yes? example: only child, absent fatherand very overprotective mother. he does nothing withouthis mother's consent. oh, this guy is forty-odd by the way. he gets divorced. and spends two years alternating between one weekendat his mum's and one with his girlfriend.

not two weeks. not two months. two years. i want to point out one thing: this man carries information,he carries a resonance, and he meets a woman who carries the same informationand resonance. otherwise, what woman would say, “oh, you're going to seeyour mother this weekend?",

for two years? one day he says, "mum..." oh, i should say that the father wasnever mentioned at the visits, he was so absent he didn't geta mention, so he's not there. i say,"could he be dead? he says,"i don't know, but he's not there." he's never there. one day, the son asks his mother,

“can i bring...?” on the weekend,he goes to his mother's. "can i bring my partner?" to which she replies, "don’t bring your floozyround here." now, let’s see, obeying one's motherisn’t the same as honouring her. is this clear? it’s not honouring her.

if he honoured himself and his mother,he'd say, "mum, do you know what? i love youto the stars and back, but you stay where you areand i’ll go with my woman." "it’s your problem. and what's more,don't call the woman i love a floozy." what mother respects her son and calls the woman he lovesa “floozy”? let's see, where is that written?

and the guy has been turned intoan idiot, a robot, so spellbound, so neutered, that he has continued like this, and he visited the surgerybecause he had this eczema. "when do you get the eczema?""when i go to see my mother." "of course." what am i saying?that he shouldn't see his mother. no. i'm saying that he should respecthimself, do you see?

is all this clear? it's an example of a visit. at the clinic: "oh, that son of mine." "what have you got?""i've got my son and my daughter." “what's that? what did you say?” “you have children?” "i have my son... and my daughter."

no, it's not a joke. that’s exactly how she said it. i’m one of those who writeseverything down so there it is. this is the typical motherwith an absent husband. when we talk about absent husbands,i want to be specific. an absent husband,for the unconscious, is: a husband who may be at home,but it's as though he isn't, a husband who may be dead, a husband who may be with prostitutes,a husband who may be out drinking,

or a husband who is in jailor simply dead. the unconscious does not judge. is that clear?he's not there. good, good! it’s very typical. so, biologically,the woman uses her son as a lifeline. and that's a grave mistake. she puts her son before her daughter,do you follow? and this is the start of the wheelof chauvinism.

women, in turn,are educated as being inferior to men. and this belief,which many think we have left behind, is clearly still with us. and there we have the seedof violence. because boys are conditionedfrom a very early age to see themselves as differentto women. we are different. now, i’m not talking aboutthis difference, but about the factthat they think they are better.

details like,when it comes to clearing the table, "let your sister do it." "and from a tender age, girls unconsciously learnthat they are inferior to men. and when they become mothers, what do they do?the same thing. and this is where the seedof addiction comes from. i have seen hundredsand hundreds of cases. overprotective mothers.

a man or womanwith alcohol or drug problems: overprotective mother,really overprotective. if i’ve seen a thousand, a thousand. no exceptions. if the father’s absentand the mother is too, as some are, in this case there is usuallyan emotional absence, i.e. there is no emotionalsustenance. so what can happen? the daughter will act as a fatherand she will look for a father;

she will act as a motherand look for a father. for example, women who marry menolder than they are. twenty years and upwards. we have a case of 40or nearly 40 years. the experience of the mother, the mother's suffering, the emotional state of the mother, will condition her children's behaviour a great deal.

a son will look for a mother in women. and he won't have a lot of sexualintercourse with his partners, because the son, the man, sees the mother, not his partner. we are so spellbound, so hypnotised, we are so conditionedby this information, that we have behaviourswe don't quite understand. when in fact,they are very easy to understand if we actually see these things.

when we understand the information shown to us by behavioural epigenetics which says such simple things as if your grandmother diedfrom a medication error, the granddaughter can be allergicto that medication. can you imagine? the daughter also ends up actinglike the mother of her mother. typical. that daughter held captiveby her mother;

in this case,there is not usually a male. in this case, there is no man. i've seen this so many timeswhen there’s no man, ok? when there’s a man,it's the previous case. but when there’s no man,that is, there’s a female, she ends up like...what’s she called... like cinderella,taking care of the stepmother. “and you have to do this.” i've got one of these cases here.

what's more, life, which is so dear,always gives us a chance. this woman i'm talking about, reminds me of a case i was told about; it wasn't one of mine. so, all her life,until her parents die. so, they’re people... for me, this topic is very dramatic,because they’re people who are robbed of their lives: parents rob their daughters lives.

literally, they rob them. they don't even have a partner. they've never known a man. nothing, nothing at all. a sterile, sterile, sterile life. living for their parentsand most of all, for the mother. but this,i’ll tell you this as an anecdote: there was a guy who had a shop andthe girl goes in and he falls in love,

and he's there insisting. men used to have to ask for their handand all that, and in the end the father says, “i don't want you to marry this guybecause he’s from madrid.” now, being from madridis like anything else. i mean... any excuse was good enough. he was from madrid. i’m only telling you this because...

but we have cases like this today. of children who have hadtheir lives taken from them i've already told youthe 50-year-old guy. it's terrible. overbearing mothers forbid their children to have any physicalor emotional independence. they use their children as a lifeboat. it's a selfish love sugar-coatedas unconditional love. “i love you so much”.

one of the biggest violences there are is that of going too farloving your children. they threaten their husbands if theyallow their children more freedom. the husband is left outof their children's education. this is where–and i’m getting ahead of myself now – children become violenttowards their parents it's called the “emperor syndrome". and all this is what jung – you know i’m a jung freak –said.

mother complex. in the son. the cybele attis complex. you have it here... do you know whatthe cybele attis complex is? aren't you locals? because you've got cybele here. don't tell me you've got a statueand no idea what she's doing there! "it’s just always been there!"

it’s not for real madridto climb up and celebrate. no, no, that came afterwards. that was later. ok? good. to summarise, cybele,the goddess cybele, had a son, attis. and she loved attis,her son, greatly. and when he became a man, she had incestuous relations with him. she possessed him so muchthat he became her lover.

but attis liked going outinto the field a lot. and in the field,he found a shepherdess. and he fell for her,and wham, bam! and cybele, of course, knows everything... so she scolds her son and the guy,to avoid ever being disloyal to his mother again, cuts off his testicles. this is the abbreviated version.

this is the cybele syndrome. so, we have childrenwho can be homosexual, lady’s men or impotent. that's not something we've said, you can read it in jung'sbook on their archetypes. it’s in there. interestingly, though,our experience mirrors it; it confirms this. then there's the mother complexin the daughter.

the daughter may have a hypertrophyof the maternal instinct and we have daughterswho act like mothers. and they see menand children as objects. you know,like the cat or the furniture. they’re just mothers, coated in great self-sacrifice, but it is relevant to this. and, or,atrophy of the female instinct. so, the other end of the scale,

which is also homosexuality,or lesbians, or they look for married mento destroy marriages. they are the typical women... what? you're in shock, aren't you? they are the typical womenwho come to see you and say, “enric, i don't knowwhat's wrong with me. ”every guy i fall for is married.” "mother complex.

what happenedwhen your mother conceived you? where was your father?" “my father, what father? my father was never around." you see? father complex. let's be clear:the father complex emerges because this child, let's not forget,was in the mother's womb… “this guy is making mothersresponsible for everything!"

what can i say?" here’s your child, your eggs choose the sperm, and they spend nine months in there. you should have chosen something else. just kidding. the son's masculinity is castrated. the father complex is the god cronus. cronus devours his children.

and he eats his childrenbecause the man, this man, in the father complexexplained by jung, is afraid that his sonwill take his place. do you see? and this is supported because the motherwaits on the son so much. and the man,because he lacks a mother, wants the woman to be for her. well, and she controlswho her daughter goes out with.

this rings a bell doesn't it? they may be your own stories,or you may have seen them. i only want to reassure you. i want you to understand thesethings, the people they happen to, because they're not crazy. it's information, that can be transcendedif you make it conscious. and don’t feel guilty, or weird, don't feel anything,don't feel anything bad.

reach consciousness. are you with me? great, now then... fear of the father; there’s a clash. and obviously,there’s lots of repetition. children repeat what their parents do. and in the daughter, fear in relationshipswith men, homosexuality. she can be very violent with herselfand she can be a strong activist.

i don't mean to say that allfemale activists are like this, people take things wrong... she can be a womanwho puts herself in danger a lot and, above all,she likes to confront men. they love that. the father keeps heraway from any man. and there’s jealousy,the father is very jealous of the men who come looking for his daughter. this is what i was explaining earlier.

in the end, the father says to thedaughter, "he's from madrid." but he could have said,"he's a cripple". and i’ll give you an example. a mother who overridesher husband's authority when he gives permissionto their 18-year-old son to go to the beachwith friends on the weekend. and he says to her... it's tradition; biologically speaking, the mother is the protectorand the father gives permission.

do we all agree? well, in some cultures it's not,but it is here. take note, he's 18. what happens to 18-year-old boys? obviously,their hormones are all over the place, they even come out of their pores,hormones. so, he wants to go with his friendsfor a weekend at the beach. and the mother...the father says yes. the most serious thing is

that she takesthe father's authority away. but there's a reason, of course. the reason isbecause he's an absent father. he's not absent because he’s absent, it's because the mother has neverallowed the father to be present. she’s like “my son, my son.” and the father works to bring home the mammoth and gets home late. and when he arrives, if there’sanything wrong with the child,

the mother takes it upon herself togloss over it, hide it, not say it... i can't go into detail on thisbecause it’s not the right time, it’s just so you are aware. now,the woman says to her husband, "if you let him go, i'm leaving." that's how it is. and the father's screwed, but when the father isn't there,the son attacks his mother, he insults her and tries to hit her.

who's in the wrong? the son? i’ll explain the hero myth now, because when hormones appearat the age of 12, 13, 14... it’s thanks to hormonesthat we start to distance ourselves from the links with our parents,that’s natural. but mothers are thereto castrate this. so he can't stand it anymore. and the options are always the same. either i’m submissive, ok?or i'm violent.

in the face of frustrationthere are always two answers: submission or violence. these are the options. so the son shouts at his mother, threatens her, and what does she do? she, who never includes the father, the driving force of the story? she goes to her husband and says, “look at what your son has done.”

“ãndele!”, as they say in mexico.“ãndele!”, “get out!”. so, this man, who has finally been grantedauthority by the mother, who's an expert manipulator, says to him, “you're right, but if you treatyour mother like that you can't go.” and the woman... what did she want? for her son to stay at home.

have i explained myself? you look like... the guy crying is the onewho's understood it the most. now,this is the emperor syndrome. so the mother should ask himwhat led her son to do this to her. the emperor syndrome is where children abuse their parents. ok, family? everything clear?

let’s get to the science. nessa carey, in“the epigenetics revolution”, on molecular biology, says, “both epigenetics and junk dna affect huge amounts of life on earth and have a big impacton human health. a mother's experiences in the first three months of pregnancy can affect her childtheir whole life."

so everything we have seenfrom experience, everything we have studied... this doctor comes out and says, “it's like this.” we also thinkthat this can't be changed. but if she's said this,it’s because she has experiences. she did some studieson a food shortage that took place in holland in the second world war. and depending on whetherthe mothers had gone hungry

in the three first months of lifeor not, ok? the children could eat whateverthey wanted without gaining weight or they would get fatjust by smelling food. so it’s important with morbid obesity to ask about the mother's lifeduring the pregnancy. there's a very interesting book, it's scientific and a bit technical,but... you can understand itwith a little effort.

and this doctor also says this... it's an example of hers from the book,she says, "a three-year-old boy is abusedand neglected by his parents. the courts give him some new parents who give him love and affectionto adulthood. these childrenare highly likely to develop problems with addiction,depression, violence, self-hatred and suicide." mothers and future mothers– and fathers, obviously –

note the importance of the momentof conception a child. and we're just doing it wham, bam!there it is, no. this exampleis to make us all think. people usually think that there's nothing more painfulthan feeling abandoned by someone we love, but that's not so. loving someone who doesn't love usis more destructive. why do i say this?

because if this is what i’m living, and you've heard what i’ve just said – with me? – how do you expectyour children to turn out? in other words, what behaviourscan you expect from your children? and all of this is proof of what we explained earlier. and you're all very quiet today. i don’t joke about this,as you can see,

because it’s somethingi really feel deep down. i see so much pain and suffering because of stupidityand human ignorance! we're living in the 21st century,but it seems that we’re just a bunch of idiots. we're not told what's most important. this. it’s like this. we stay in relationships hopingthat our partners will change. it’s like sitting and waiting

for the sun to rise in the westand set in the east. don't worry! it’s not going to happen. and they wait and wait and wait. sweetie, if you want to changeyour life, change yourself. don’t expect anyone to change. let’s talk about dignity. dignity is not self-love. it’s real self-love. putting myself before anyone else.

nobody has the right to hijackmy life, ok? whether they're my parentsor holy virgins. all with me? so,dignity is the love and affection that we owe to ourselves. and it is written:“love your neighbour as yourself.” and "a course in miracles" says, “just as you love yourselflove your neighbour.” we need to learn to say,

“mum, dad, thank you.i love you. no. that's all." a few more examplesto keep you satisfied. woman with muscular dystrophy. these are from my clinic. her mother forces her to marrya man she doesn't love. and not only does she force her,she hits her too to make her get married. she physically hits her. this man is glued to herfor the whole of her life.

he doesn't hit her,he's glued to her. for a woman to appear like that, the guy has to have zero balls. she spends her whole life in lovewith another guy. her whole life. forced to care for her motherfor seven years. forced. that's how she says it. who forces her? herself? we always saythat if we want to wake up,

if we want healing, we should avoid talkingabout the other. so, my mother doesn't force me,i force myself. my mother doesn’t. i can always say,“no, that’s enough.” are you with me?right. her son leaves home. and gets marriedwithout telling her. and she doesn't get it.

and i say,“you don't get it?” but it’s obvious. “no, why?”because he carries information. in this house, in this family, people don't marrythe person they want to. and in his unconscious,he says to his mum, “goodbye!” and two years later,she finds out from a neighbour that her son is married.

i say, “don't you see?” "and i wanted him to comeand live with me and my mother in our house.” and the son... this lady, when it was all over,just imagine how spellbound she was... her mother screwed up her life, her mother hit her. that gave her a very unhappy lifewith her marriage. always in love with another man.

forced to care for her dictator. stockholm syndrome. for seven years. she lost her son. because he had his headscrewed on and said, "yeah right. i’m off." and she categorically states, “i feel guilty for not looking aftermy mother better." 53-year-old guywith two lung tumours.

domineering mother. the children, five brothers, can't do anythingwithout the mother's permission. i'm talking about men aged30, 35, 40, 45 and 60 years old. and the woman's there like this... his mother's wishesare hypnotic orders for him. all the partners he's hadare like his mother. all of them. he's never been able to marry.

it goes without saying why. he feels trapped. and he says, "when i have a projectin my life..." – listen carefully to just how trappedand screwed up we can be – he says, "and when i have a projectwho do i tell about it? my mother. and my mother always dismisses

it.” and she says to them, "all come round on sunday." and they all go round. with the wives. those who have one, of course;this one didn’t. good, let's carry on. man with eczema all over his body. single, 40-something as well.

never been in a stable relationship.sexual problems. travels constantly to the east. forces himself to go roundto his parents before a trip. and i ask him,“do you want to see them?” and he says,"no." and i say,“why then?” and he says,“they're my parents.” "tell me aboutyour parents’ relationship.” “my parents never loved each other.

never, never. they’ve always actedlike a married couple.” i say,"tell me about your grandparents." “the same. what’s more, my maternalgrandparents were not only married, but my grandfather had a loverand my grandmother did too, but they stayed married." and what does he do?he doesn’t marry anybody. he doesn't have a partner,he doesn’t have sex. nothing.

but there comes a time when we tempt fate too often and he has to go away again, and the eczema appears. it's related to a conflictof separation, etcetera. we’re talking about the hero myth. just so you know, all of whatwe're seeing has been the subject of intense study, but peopledon't know about it. the hero mythrepresents the consolidation

of the personality in the male aspect. the male aspect. only in the male aspect. and they are tests that any son must pass to become a man. he has to transform. that is, it is the future manwho stops being a child in order to become a teenager, to be independentand set up his own home.

more than half will diein the attempt, because that's the job of the witch, who's the mother. eric neumann, a friend of jung,developed the hero myth. you already know that jung, well, freud and jung, developedthe electra and oedipus complex but he works on this. in fact,there is a book or a documentary based on the relationshipbetween jung and eric neumann

called "the twelve letters”. they exchanged letters.this was before whatsapp and all that. they wrote letters describing this. he says that the hero, or the manwho is to become the hero, is born and that his first task,or first test, is adolescence. everybody knowsthat in adolescence our child changes."what happened to the boy?" this is the first thingthat the child has to overcome.

the second, is to overcomethe castration of the mother. this is called"overcoming the matriarchy". when the hero has passedthese two tests, for which he deserves a medal, there's one left, which is to overcomethe father's prohibition. when the hero faces adolescence, when he manages to break freefrom the castrating mother, he then has to facethe authoritarian or prohibitive dad,

or whatever. still with me, right? and once the son has completedthese three stages, we have a manwho can care for a clan. attention, dads. attention, mums. the day my son hit me, i said, “look. he’s just killed his daddy." the hero myth. we must be aware of this;some parents don't allow it. they say things like,

“don’t forget that i'm your fatherand you'll obey me until..." you may be my father,i must honour and respect you, but if you don't respect me,you’ll get what you give. "bye, bye", "agur", "adã©u","arrivederci", "goodbye". you got that, didn't you? be aware that everythingwe discuss in the talk has references in psychoanalysis,epigenetics and our own experience,which is why we’re here explaining it. we need to reach consciousness,

which is what we teachin bioneuroemociã³n. in bioneuroemociã³n,we don't want people to say to you, “stiff upper lip.you've just been unlucky." no, no. reaching consciousnessis transcending this information, not from resentment, but fromunderstanding and forgiveness. do you follow? it’s about taking the informationto another level. now we’re talking about what we do.

we don't consider ourselves victims. we don't blame anybody. not our fathers, or our mothers.nobody. we honour them deeply and we will honour thembecause we are able to overcome and transcend their miasmasand the crap that they were conditioned within their own lives. we don't become victims,we become rescuers. we accept our inheritance,

not because we’re good,but because we wake up. and because we are aware of the factthat, if these are our parents, it is because our soulchose them to be like this. so, shy away from blameand victimhood, accept your parents as they are. they didn’t, couldn'tor didn't want to. we aren't here to judge them. they lived their own experiencesas a result of the unconscious informationthey received, just like you.

be assertive, talk to them, take responsibility, don't fall into the emotional trapsthat they set for you out of fear, through their programming. they have repeated the teachingsthat they received; you are here to transcend them. this is how we honour our parents. do you know how many parentsi have met who've said to me, “thanks enric.i would have never thought

that my son was like this”? if i'm not mistaken,there’s a video now, no, it's later. set your parents free, stop wanting your parents to love you as you want them to. set them free. we have these addictivelove-hate relationships with women who hate their parents but are constantly battlingwith their mother or father,

hoping that the motheror father will love them. “look, when your parents made you,they didn't want you, for whatever reason.ok? but they had theirunconscious reasons.” we’re not here to judge,but to accept them as they are. this is love; anything else is to screw them over. assertive parenting. pay attention to your childrenand their needs,

respect their ideas and initiatives, avoid belittling them, argue with them on their levelwithout imposing yourself with things like, “i'm your father.”are you with me? put yourself at your child’slevel of perception avoid disqualifying them with thingslike, "what would you know?" maybe your son doesn't know,but don’t deprive him of knowing. don't deprive him of the experience. don’t be shocked; avoid judging.

one mother said to me, “our son goes out witha different girl every day." and i said,"well, he knows more." what do you want me to say?" "oh, but you should say something." “i do:‘son, don't get her pregnant.'" we are always projectingand all that. i remember one guy who broke his toe and i said to him,

“when did you break your toe?" “at the beach.” "ah, and who were you withat the beach?" “my parents.”“and who else?” "my new girlfriend." "and what's going on with the girl?""what’s the thing...?" “i was thinking,‘what if my mother doesn't like her.'" “and what do you base that on? “well, i had one once and she told me,‘not this one.’"

that’s a mother!who needs locking up. to keep her quiet for a while. he broke his toebecause it's associated with “mother" and "collateral". it’s related to the motherand collateral. and he says, “yeah, yeah.” now, she did like that one. and breaking a bonewas the solution to the conflict. and he was happy,limping a bit, but he was ok.

“and do you know why your motherlikes this one and not the other?” he says,"i think i do." i’ll tell you why:"the first one was just like her.” "yes, she said to me,‘you've got me for a woman.'" "and she can control the other one." and he says,"wow, you know a lot." "she likes her causeshe knows she can control her." “and do you knowwhat you have to do? be assertive, hug your mother:‘i love you.’

goodbye.” we need to overcome castration. and i’ll end with this phrase. forgive your parents,forgive yourself. we are all children andwe might be parents one day. and if we're not,let’s forgive ourselves too. thank you very much.